Here are today’s top stories in no particular order:
- The Iraqi journalist who notoriously threw a shoe at former President Bush has been welcomed home after nine months in prison. He says that while in prison he went through electric shock and waterboarding, which might have been a tad bit excessive.
- A Florida high school student was stabbed to death this morning after a fight broke out between classes. One of his fellow classmates has been taken into custody.
- Elton John sought to adopt a child from Ukraine, but was apparently turned down for being too old and too gay. [Editor’s note: Said child is potentially Jewish – his name is Lev.]
- New laws in the Indonesian province of Aceh will allow adulterers to be stoned to death. How’s that for progress?
- A student at Johns Hopkins University had his Playstation and two laptops stolen, so he slayed the burglar with a samurai sword. Naturally.
- If you live in France, don’t work for France Telecom. But if you do, be aware that they are now offering a free hotline for workers undergoing severe stress, after facing 23 suicides within the company in the last 18 months.
- You’ve heard about the Kanye West/Taylor Swift drama from Sunday night’s VMAs. But have you heard President Obama’s take on it? He thinks Kanye is a jackass. Oops – prematurely Tweeted!
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