Now that summer is, for all intents and purposes (if not yet officially), over, all our favorite TV shows are on their way back from their all-too-long summer hiatus. Schmidt will be Schmidt and a slightly more mature Rachel Berry will make her NYADA debut. Eli Gold will continue to spin everything and who knows if Dr. Cristina Yang will be back (well, IMDB does). And while we can’t wait for all that, we interrupt your regularly scheduled programming to take a look at this season’s potential Network Jews. Not the ones that have warmed their way into your heart through hours of watching and rewatching, but the ones who might have that honor if they don’t get prematurely canceled. We’re the first to admit that it’s difficult to judge a character by a four-minute promo, but we won’t let that stop us.

Partners, CBS: Perhaps the Jewiest Network Jew on the horizon is David Krumholtz’s Joe on CBS’s Partners. It doesn’t hurt that Krumholtz (who we love as Joseph Gordon Levitt’s guide in 10 Things I Hate About You, but you may know from Numb3rs) is actually Jewish and grew up in Queens. From what we can glean, Partners is about two guys (one who wants to marry Alyssa Milano when he grows up—that would be Krumholtz—and the other who wants to marry Bette Midler—that would be his stereotypically gay best friend Louis, played by Michael Urie of Ugly Betty fame) and their joint architecture firm. Just kidding! It’s about their relationship drama, or really Krumholtz’s hesitation to propose to his non-Jewish girlfriend Ali (shouldn’t Ted Mosby make a cameo at some point?)

The trailer seems to harp on this proposal (leading to such lines as “that’s what your shmekel is telling you”) and the ensuing catastrophe typical of such shows, but in the end all is right in the world and the only drama that’s left is trying to figure out how Joe and Louis’ relationship will harm Joe and Ali’s relationship (oh, did we mention she’s played by Sophia Bush?).

Jewiness: Hesitation about intermarriage? Check. Words like shmekel? Check.

Watchability: Do you really want to watch Micahel Urie talk about David Krumholtz’s shmekel? Or Sophia Bush in general? We didn’t think so.

The Mindy Project, Fox: This may be more of a supporting role, but we’re hoping that Richard Schiff, you know, that Sorkin Jew, will have a larger place in the hospital of Fox’s The Mindy Project. Granted he only has about two lines in the pilot episode (available now on Hulu). Sample: “You are eight and a half months pregnant. You’re husbands gotta keep his schvantz away from you.”

Jewiness: Even with his limited dialogue, Schiff manages to throw in a schvantz joke. Yep, that’s another Yiddish word for penis. Oh, and he’s a Jewish doctor, enough said.

Watchability: We’ll always give Mindy Kaling a chance (especially now that she’s done with The Office).

Go On, NBC: We’re going to go out on a limb here and guess that Laura Benanti’s Lauren Schneider on NBC’s Matthew Perry-starring show, Go On, is Jewish. After all, Matthew Perry is no stranger to playing a character with Jewish friends. While there are no versions of the Yiddish word for penis to help us out, we have faith that Season 1 won’t disappoint.

Perry plays a sportscaster who is dealing with the death of his wife and is forced by his boss (or so it seems from the pilot that NBC “sneak-previewed” after the Summer Olympics—which and is now available on Hulu) to attend mandatory counseling. For reasons that aren’t exactly clear, instead of paying for therapy (he appears to be relatively well-off), he decides to attend day-time sessions of group therapy at what can only be described as a community rec-center (during the same time slot there seem to be a group of sci-fi/war re-enacters). Enter Schneider, the groups not-so-put-together leader (who we imagine will play some sort of love interest will-they-or-won’t-the couple with Perry’s character) who has no formal training (aside from Weight Watchers) to guide her. Hilarity will (we hope) ensue.

Jewiness: Unclear, we’re guessing (hoping!) that Schneider is Jewish, but so far there’s no proof.

Watchability: Channeling a bit of Chandler’s sarcasm and throw in the hodge-podge friendships of Community, we’re definitely giving this show a chance.

Who’d we miss and who are you looking forward to watching? Let us know in the comments.

The post Network Jews: Fall Preview—Partners, The Mindy Project, and Go On appeared first on Jewcy.

There are two types of people in this world: Those who will proclaim, loudly and often, that Seinfeld is the greatest sitcom ever created, and those who will audibly agree—but secretly prefer Friends.

Any self-respecting MOT in the second group should feel especially ashamed. After all, Seinfeld is practically the televised equivalent of FUBU—or perhaps FJBJ. Though the phenomenally successful series was and is popular among latke-eaters and mayo-lovers alike, many of the series’ most famous episodes—the one with the chocolate babka, the one with Elaine’s shiksappeal, the one with the mohel, for Chaim’s sake—are unapologetic about their Semitic bent. Bright, silly Friends, by contrast, seems blandly all-American, utterly nondenominational—goyish, even.

And yet Seinfeld’s white-bread cousin was created by two Brandeis grads, composed by a writing staff that was “a third to half” Jewish, and largely populated by archetypes familiar to anyone who’s ever logged time at a Jewish summer camp. There’s Rachel Green (Jennifer Aniston), the spoiled JAP with a heart of gold and a fixed nose; her best friend Monica Geller (Courteney Cox), the formerly overweight, hyper-competitive neurotic; and Monica’s older brother Ross (David Schwimmer), the nerdy nebbish with a mournful look and an unfortunate fondness for hair gel.

Though any Jew worth her weight in geldings would recognize these three as kindred spirits, a casual, gentile viewer could go years without realizing that one half of the whitest sextet on television is secretly ethnic. Rachel, Monica, and Ross’ Jewishness is tacit rather than Seinfeld-ishly explicit. It peeks through via their last names, their Long Island origin stories, their fondness for quips, and their difficult relationships with their mothers.

But if your average viewer were forced to choose which Friends character seemed most Hebrew, chances are he’d immediately point to Ross. The series’ unlikely romantic lead has the stereotypically dark looks of what Granny Hall would call a “real Jew.” His intellectually focused profession (paleontologist), whiny voice, and emasculating history (married a lesbian, played the bagpipes, got stuck in a pair of leather pants) also mark him as a classic schlimazel.

Yet even Ross almost never acknowledges his Jewish background. In a way, this makes sense: Ross is an academic first and foremost, meaning he’s much more likely to lecture his pals about evolution than to discuss Talmud. It’s no coincidence that the one time Professor Ross does speak openly about his Jewish heritage—in Season 7’s “The One With the Holiday Armadillo”—he has an educational mission: He’s trying to teach his son Ben about Hanukkah.

Ben, an assimilated kid weaned on Christmas specials and red-and-green wrapping paper, proves a hard nut to crack. So Ross quickly gives up his quest and resolves to rent a Santa suit instead—only to find none available so close to December 25. Friends isn’t exactly known for verisimilitude; rather than visiting another store or nixing the costume altogether, Ross opts for an unconventional outfit and appears to Ben as The Holiday Armadillo. Cue laugh track.

The Holiday Armadillo does manage to achieve Ross’ goal, imparting Christmas tidings as well as the story of Hanukkah—with a few twists, thanks to his well-meaning but dense Catholic friend Joey (Matt LeBlanc). (Says Matthew Perry’s Chandler when the tale is over: “My favorite part was when Superman flew all the Jews out of Egypt!”) The gang ends the episode by lighting up a Hanukkiah—only to forget entirely about Hanukkah when the next season’s “holiday” episode rolls around.

Ross’ blatant addressing of his family’s Judaism is clumsy and goofy; each time Jewish actor David Schwimmer says the word Hanukkah, he sounds like a Spanish instructor deliberately pronouncing the word fajita. Perhaps, then, it’s for the best that his—and Monica’s, and Rachel’s—religious background went mostly unremarked upon throughout Friends’ run. It’s more fun to play a game of “Spot the Tacit References” than to wince at benevolent but awkward attempts to make the implied explicit.

Previously on Network Jews:

Dr. Glenn Richie, the Jewish doctor on Childrens Hospital

Jeremy Goodwin, the wide-eyed Wunderkind on Sports Night

Harry Goldenblatt, the unlikely Casanova on Sex and the City

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