When considering this year’s options, we realized Today is International Women’s Day (and the Women’s General Strike). And so, here are a list of Jewish women you should portray for Purim (though anyone of any gender can rock these looks!).

Specifically, these are fictional women, because 1) Reality is too weird and surreal right now, 2) These figures are culturally iconic, and 3) Someone at that party is already going to be the Notorious R.B.G., so you might as well go a different route:

Cher Horowitz belongs at the top of this list. Do we need to explain why? As if! Good luck picking just one look, though we suggest the yellow plaid. Besides, now is her time:

Baby Houseman from Dirty Dancing, OF COURSE! Wear a tank top and jean shorts, or capris with a shirt tied above your navel. When in doubt, carry a watermelon. Make a male partner wear all black and generally look like Patrick Swayze. Everybody wins. Bonus points for doing the lift.

Rebecca of York (from Ivanhoe) isn’t as big of a name as some of the others on this list, but she’s A) great and B) an excuse to recycle your garb from the Renaissance Faire (if you’re the type of person to choose this costume, you already have the dress). Plus, real life icon/Jewish woman Elizabeth Taylor played her— consider it a layered reference.

Batwoman, the superhero alter-ego of Kate Kane, is both Jewish, and gay— did you know? Rock the bodysuit. She has an A+ cape:

Kitty Pryde is another Jewish superhero (her queerness isn’t canon, but boy are there some convincing think pieces), and she has the benefit of changing her costume every freaking five minutes. Your possibilities are endless. And pretty please, someone, anyone, do the costume where she wears striped thigh-highs and roller skates.

Once, for Purim I dressed as how Kitty Pryde would dress if she were Wolverine for Purim. Yes, really:

Willow Rosenberg is the last niche, geeky choice on the list. But she’s a great one— gay, Jewish, a literal witch. Bonus points if you’re Vampire Willow (which also works if you have dark hair rather than red).

Fran Fine. Beehive. Leopard print. Nasal impersonation that will get you kicked out of a party. Go kill it.

Rhoda Morgenstern is one of the most important Jewish women on TV— way before Rebecca Bunch or Grace Adler, and boy did she have style. Find your most 70s shirt, and tie a scarf on your head. Voilà— an homage to Valerie Harper.

We confess that this list is disappointingly white— Jewish fictional characters skew way more homogeneous than we actually are, and rare Jews of color in media tend to be male. But there is Cristina Yang from Grey’s Anatomy who’s both Asian-American and Jewish (and scrubs and a name tag make for an easy costume). And written fiction offers significantly more options, like in the fantasy world of Shira Glassman (also, bonus points because it’s super queer). It’s not as obvious a choice as Cher, but we have to build our icons somehow.

Pretty please tweet us pictures of your costume! And hurry— you only have a few days left!

Images via Wikimedia, except for the embarrassing one of the writer, via Facebook.

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1. Female Empowerment Vashti

Why not get political in the midst of the latest debate about female nudity as empowerment vs. exploitation? The costume would take very little effort; all you need is, say, a crown and the illusion of nudity everywhere else.  Maybe try a large covering posterboard that says: “This is my choice,” or, “Not for Achashverosh’s eyes.”

2. Star Wars Characters

Is it a bit expected this year?  Maybe, but if you have the dough to drop, it shouldn’t be difficult to buy a readymade look from any costume shop. And Etsy, as it turns out, is full of baby BB-8 costumes.

For women who dress traditionally modestly, Leia’s original white dress is fully covering, and Rey’s look would take perhaps the most minor of tweaks to make it tznius as well. If you bring in one of Leia’s looks from the new film, you and your mom could even dress up together! Aw!

Besides, it is my personal headcanon that Rey is short for Reyzl.

3. Jesus

Purim is about being edgy and subversive, but unfortunately also often displays a lack of effort (serious cosplay at Purim gets a side-eye; I know from experience).  So why not be blasphemous and lazy at the same time with a costume of the Prince of Peace?

Let’s face it.  If you have long hair and a beard, you already look like him.  Just throw on a white robe and some sandals, and maybe carry some wine or matzah, and you’re good to go.

4. A Holy Ark

This one is a bit more detailed.  I dressed as an Aron Kodesh about five years ago, so this may partially be an excuse to brag on it.

My costume base was all black clothing, and on my body I wore a cardboard box that I decorated with marble-patterned contact paper and Hebrew letters like you might see on a real ark.

Then, the reveal. Open your box in the front to reveal a Torah on your torso. Mine was made out of paper, so it was lightweight and quick to make. I added a “Ner Tamid” in facepaint on my forehead, and voila! The ultimate Purim costume that works any year.

5. Donald Trump as Haman

This one is easy.  Wear a suit, orange face-paint, an ugly wig, a triangle hat, and a cartoonish moustache. Wait for a fascist at the megillah reading to get into a fight with you. Before fists start to fly, I suggest you use the line:

“I’m the designated driver tonight.  Good thing I’m only drinking until I can no longer tell the difference between Haman and Trump.”

MAKE PURIM GREAT AGAIN! TRUMP/HAMAN 2016 #trump pic.twitter.com/JwIQQkRVt4

— Rabbi Jason Miller (@RabbiJason) March 16, 2016

Feel free to tweet @Jewcy with any more ideas, or photos of any of these!  You still have a few days, so go go GO!

Image sources: Wikimedia commons, Facebook

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Ruth Baby Ginsberg wins Halloween, so stop trying. (h/t @NaamaHaviv) pic.twitter.com/T9ETbhL025

— Taffy BrodesserAkner (@taffyakner) October 31, 2014

When he’s not masquerading as Supreme Court judge Ruth Bader Ginsburg (A.K.A. Notorious R.B.G.), ‘lil Sycamore (yep, that’s his name) is just a regular civilian baby. Today, however, he’s a clip-on-earring-wearing infant feminist badass. His mother, Kate Livingston, submitted this snap to Huffington Post when they put out the call for photos of babies dressed up for Halloween. Kate, we humbly prostrate ourselves before your internet genius.

This situation could only get better if Ruth Baby Ginsburg ended up on a t-shirt worn by Ruth Bader Ginsburg. Given her penchant for the Notorious R.B.G. meme, we’d say the possibility of this happening is high.

Internet, work your magic!

Related: Ruth Bader Ginsburg Has “Quite a Large Supply” of Those Notorious R.B.G. T-Shirts
Justices Elena Kagan and Ruth Bader Ginsburg Share Personal Trainer, Mutual Admiration

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If your cat is like mine, she is highly religious and desperately wanting to participate in the holiday of Purim.  I say, make a mitzvah. Dress your cat up for Purim.  Here are some of the best Purim cat costumes I’ve seen:

The King cat– Make Ahashverous proud. For the cat that wants to be king, but perhaps tires of the traditional crown and jewels.

Batman cat– Simple, badass elegance. Give your shy cat a sense of confidence at any Purim party.

Sushi cat– For the modern Jewish cat. Lighter on the carbs than hamantaschen.

Davy Crockatt – American pioneer, biblical pioneer. The hat makes it work.

Queen Esther cat- A more traditional approach to Purim.
Dress your cat like the princess she demands to be.

Lobster cat– Treif. I couldn’t resist.

The post The Jewish Cat Lady Talks Purim Costumes appeared first on Jewcy.

2.  Starting a Holiday at Sundown – What can I say?  This was our idea. We do that EVERY TIME.

3. Even though we don’t think anybody has taken up the challenge of being “Slutty Maimonides,” we think once this catches on, it will be bigger than dressing up like a sexy cat.

4. Bram Stoker’s Dracula – Although based on a figure out of Romanian mythology who was known for being a violent defender of Christianity, Dracula himself is anti-Semitic-stereotype incarnate. You’ve got the failure to integrate into society, the hoarded wealth, the literal blood-sucking (only Christians, of course), the metaphorical blood-sucking (only Christian society, of course), and the demented sexuality. Add to that the accent, the nose, and the eccentricity, and you’ve got Jew-stereotypes wrapped up in a pretty Eastern-European immigrant fear-frenzy package!

5. Frankenstein – An enormous, hulking humanoid, brought to life from non-natural means and toward selfish ends, goes on to have a live and exploits far beyond the expectations and control of its creator. Nah man, that’s the Golem! Jews of Prague did it first.

6. While we’re at it, you can thank us for some of the most classic spooky films ever made: Dracula, Frankenstein and The Mummy all came out of Universal Studios.  Who owned Universal Studios?  The Laemmle family.  They were Jews.

7. Jerry Seinfeld’s comedy – Any observational comedian can crack wise about airplane food.  It takes a pro to turn the childhood traumas of Halloween into comedy gold.

8.  Dentists.  A lot of Jews are dentists.  We asked our friend, Dr. Neil Fedderman, DDS if the time after Halloween is a good time for business. His answer: “I put three kids through college thanks to Nov. 1 through Dec. 1st.”

9.  Without Jews, gentiles would have one less stupid costume idea.

10.  Can we just come out and say that Halloween as we know it got at least half of its good ideas from Jews? Purim? Anybody? Anybody?

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