Israeli TV is taking over the world! (Or at least the Emmys.) Leading the latest charge is David Schwimmer, who has been doing… what, exactly, since Friends ended? We’re not sure. Anyway! His latest project sounds cool. It’s an adaptation of the hit Israeli TV show Bilti Hafich, which is a bit like Curb Your Enthusiasm, but instead of Larry David driving everyone crazy, it’s a couple with a baby. (WHICH TOTALLY RESONATES, amirite?!) The U.S. version will be called Irreversible and David Schwimmer will star as the hapless writer Dad.

We’re sure this one will go down a treat with the Silver Lake/Park Slope/[insert hip urban baby-filled neighborhood here] set. Or it could be terrible. We’ll see.

Behatzlacha, David!

The post The Wave Of The Israeli TV Adaptations Continues appeared first on Jewcy.

Richard Kind might be best known as that guy from Curb Your Enthusiasm, but tonight he spoke at the AIPAC policy conference gala event and made a surprising request to the crowd—that someone hire his nephew.

After revealing the fun fact that his niece plays professional basketball in Israel, Kind had the camera pan to his nephew in the crowd (of 13,000). After asking why he was sitting in the rich people section, Kind told the crowd that his nephew just graduated from Penn State—and needs a job.

So, who’s going to hire him?

***

Like this post? Sign up for our weekly newsletter to get new Jewcy stories in your inbox every Thursday.

The post ‘Curb Your Enthusiasm’ Actor Richard Kind’s Nephew Needs a Job appeared first on Jewcy.

Flu season is upon us, and whether you’ve had it or been around people who have it, chances are you’re probably complaining about it. From sickly coworkers to sniffling family members, no one is safe.

What better way to fight the flu*—and stay stylish—than with these printable flu masks bearing the faces of your favorite Jewish stars? Just download the PDF, cut along the dotted lines, punch holes where marked and tie the mask on, and you’re all set! You can thank us later, once you’ve Purell-ed. Masks by the one and only Margarita Korol of Urban Pop Art Projects.

Option 1: The Larry David

It’s pretty, pretty, pretty gross out there with everyone coughing all over the place. Take a bold stand against all the sick people around you by pledging allegiance to the king of principled decision-making.

Printer-friendly Larry David flu mask [PDF]

Option 2: The Lena Dunham

You’re almost kind of getting it together this flu season, but not so much that you’ve actually gotten a flu shot or taken any real precautions. Never fear, the unflappable writer/director/tweeter has you covered—literally.

Printer-friendly Lena Dunham flu mask [PDF]

Option 3: The Jason Schwartzman

Bored to death of the interminable flu season? Stroll around Brooklyn fearlessly with Schwartzman’s mustachioed face atop your own. Moonrise Kingdom khaki scout cap sold separately.

Printer-friendly Jason Schwartzman flu mask [PDF]

Option 4: The Natalie Portman

Flu season got you on your toes? Take a page from the Black Swan herself and you’ll get an Aleph for effort.

Printer-friendly Natalie Portman flu mask [PDF]

Option 5: The Woody Allen

Show the world—or everyone on the subway, at least—that you’re so much more than a run-of-the-mill hypochondriac with this facial salute to the master alarmist himself.

Printer-friendly Woody Allen flu mask [PDF]

*Fine print: These paper masks probably won’t prevent the flu or any other real afflictions, but they’ll go a long way toward combating hypochondria and looking awesome.

The post Printable Flu Masks With Your Favorite Jewish Stars’ Faces on Them appeared first on Jewcy.

Forget JDate and the 10,999 Jewish singles who are online now and share your desire for friendship and romance. Seven Jewish men living in DC have decided to find their seven soul mates with a supremely cringeworthy Craiglist ad:

Shalom! We are five handsome and two not so handsome single men. And, yes, we are Jewish. Bound by tradition and emboldened by wit, we are hosting an epic Shabbat dinner — a little challah, a little wine, and a lot of gefilte fish — in downtown Washington, DC on Friday, January 18, 2013. In a nod to our orgiastic traditions, we are inviting seven lucky ladies to feast with us. Echoing the State of Israel’s Declaration of Independence, we will consider you, “irrespective of religion or race,” as long as you “bring your own lactaid pills.

To be considered, please submit a picture of yourself. We’d also like to hear more about you.

While the men have most certainly congratulated their own brilliance (demanding photos ≠ very original), the litmus test they’ve created to narrow down their apparently large romance pool inadvertently concedes the limitations of their wit. If you can correctly decide what the the 11th Commandment should be and what your favorite episode of Seinfeld is, but then avoid revealing your answers, you might just win a spot at the table.

Please answer two of the following questions with another question: What’s your favorite Shabbos activity? Which biblical forefather do you admire most and why? What would you establish as the 11th Commandment? What’s your favorite episode of Seinfeld? Curb Your Enthusiasm? Which character from Girls speaks most to your personality? What is your favorite double mitzvah? Why would you answer a Craigslist ad about a Shabbat dinner?

You must also answer two of the following, not in question form. Where do you go to get your hair straightened? Are you a self-hating Jew? Have you read Portnoy’s Complaint? Explain why a two-state solution would or would not work? How do you feel about the Shoah? What is your favorite yiddish word and farvus? Zach Braff: Dreamy, or in your dreams? Do you appreciate hairy backs?

The ad has been updated to report that many interested parties have in fact already contacted them, though they’d still “love more responses” in order to find their true besherts.

Suffice it so say, Jewcy isn’t swooning.

Seven Single White Jewish Males Looking to Host Seven Single Females [Craigslist] (image via Shutterstock)

The post Craigslist: Desperate Jewish Men Seek Attractive Jewish Women appeared first on Jewcy.

This Sunday night, the 64th annual Emmy Awards will honor the best in television. Each year a handful of episodes from each of the nominated series are selected to showcase a show’s best work. Since we’re in the business of honoring the best in Jewish television, we present the top five Jewish moments from this year’s Emmy-nominated shows, from Palestinian chicken and Camp Ramah to terrorists and concentration camps.

1. Curb Your Enthusiasm (Season 8: “Palestinian Chicken”)

Larry (Larry David) and Jeff (Jeff Garlin) try a new popular Palestinian chicken place and deem it the perfect place for Jewish men to bring their mistresses since no Jews would ever eat there. (Alan Dershowitz even sent Bibi a copy!)

Air Date: July 24, 2011
Choice Line: “We’re probably the only Jews that have ever walked in here.”

2. Homeland (Season 1: “The Weekend”)

Saul Berenson (Mandy Patinkin) opens up about his lonely Jewish upbringing to his terrorist suspect passenger while driving back to CIA headquarters, creating an unexpected parallel between their situations.

Air Date: Nov. 13, 2011
Choice Line: “I’d gladly say their prayers, sing the songs. I just wanted to not be alone.”

Unfortunately a YouTube clip doesn’t exist (let us know in the comments if you find one!), but the entire episode is available on iTunes—the scene starts at the 37-minute mark.

3. Boardwalk Empire (Season 2: “To The Lost”)

Butcher Manny Horvitz hides out in the basement of a synagogue as he nostalgically remembers his Ukrainian past and plots out his future.

Air Date: Dec. 11, 2012
Choice Line: “I wake up sometimes and think I’m still there [Odessa], 12 years old, my whole life ahead of me, but then I realize I’m in America. That world is gone.”

4. Mad Men (Season 5: “Far Away Places”)

Copywriter Michael Ginsberg (Ben Feldman), explicitly hired to appease Jewish client Manischewitz, reveals that he was born in a concentration camp, turning a punch line about the token Jew into a far more serious self-reflective matter that haunts the office.

Air Date: April 22, 2012
Choice Line: “Are there others like you?” / “I don’t know, I haven’t been able to find any.”

Again, there’s no YouTube clip available, but the entire episode is on iTunes—the scene starts at the 12 minute mark.

5. Girls (Season 1: “Hannah’s Diary”)

The excitable Shoshanna runs into an old friend who remembers her best from a raid she led during their days together at Camp Ramah.

Air Date: May 6, 2012
Choice Line: “You led the most intense kitchen raid I ever saw in my time as a junior counselor.”

Have another favorite Jewish scene from this year? Let us know in the comments!

The post Emmy Awards 101: This Season’s Most Jewish Moments on Television appeared first on Jewcy.

Larry David lent his star power in the ’18-24 young person demographic’ to a voting initiative directed at young Americans, filming a slightly awkward, if well-intentioned, short video.

“Not to vote…why are you even living here?” he asks. “You could be living anywhere. You could be living in Iran, or North Korea, how would you like that? Then you could sit on your couch.”

The post Larry David Really Wants You to Vote in the 2012 Presidential Election appeared first on Jewcy.

Asked about the news, Dunham gave possibly the best answer we could have asked for:

You know that song they sing at Passover, “Dayenu,” which is, “It would have been enough.” If God had just taken us out of the desert, it would have been enough. If He’d give us a cow, it would have been enough. But he did all this other stuff. I feel like with everything that happens, Dayenu.

Mayim Bialik is up for best supporting actress for her role as Amy Farrah Fowler on The Big Bang Theory, which was also nominated for best comedy series. Larry David is in the running for best actor in a comedy series for his similarly-nominated Curb Your Enthusiasm. Most exciting of all, however, is Max Greenfield’s nod for best actor in a comedy series, for his absurdly spot-on performance as Schmidt in New Girl.

Homeland, based on the Israel show Hatufim, cleaned up nicely with 9 total nominations—a record number for a new series—with star Claire Danes up for best actress in a drama.

Mazel tov to all the nominees!

(Photo by Slaven Vlasic/Getty Images)

The post Emmy Nods for Lena Dunham, Mayim Bialik, and New Girls’ Schmidt appeared first on Jewcy.

What did you do for LD’s big day?

(Photo by Frederick M. Brown/Getty Images)

The post A Birthday Song for Larry David appeared first on Jewcy.

Be Warned! Before you engage in a loving relationship with another person, find out whether or not they have respect for wood!

And you know what really chaps my ass?  Ersatz Jews!  How dare a man live life with all the privileges and freedom of mind that comes along with being a non-Jew, only to one day slap a mezuzah on the and siphon business from Jewish professionals.  I’m talking to you Mr. Cats, and you Mr. Cone.

That’s right, just when we thought we were out, Larry David pulls us back in with tightly squinted eyes and a “pret-tey good.” This new season of Curb picked up where we left off, with Larry on the precipice of winning back Cheryl.  Yet, in classic Curb style, the episode begins with things falling apart.

One of the greatest things about Curb Your Enthusiasm, is its ability to shine a light on social annoyances, that which chaps the ass of the everyday neurotic Jew.  We can only hope that this kind of heightened awareness will one day end the tyrannical reign of such biting little annoyances.

This Week’s Foray into Social Justice:  Buffet Fine Print

The buffet is expensive.  Thus, if I chose to buy in, I intend to feast.  When I eat at a buffet, I imagine myself sitting in a large medieval dining hall surrounded by knights and jesters, munching animal legs with Genghis Kahn like sloppiness.  If I want to offer one of my humble subjects a crab leg, I do not appreciate being swooped down upon by the staff and scolded for sharing, it absolutely pulverizes the fantasy, the buffet is ruined!   You cannot limit the buffet.  Buffet means no limits!  That’s where the word comes from, it’s French for “endless.”

Perhaps Larry should have an attorney to follow him wherever he goes, arguing with ushers to let him into the theater with water and making little girls sign a contract before he agrees to cut their doll’s hair.

Now, Curb fans tend to fall into two categories.  Some people see Larry David’s character as a: jerk, a dunce, an a-hole.  These people are secondary fans, who watch the show mainly for the moments of Seinfeld-like glory that pop up from time to time.  Afterwards they commiserate about how annoying Larry is and how much they miss Seinfeld.
Then there are those who watch the show and think, “Why is everyone always giving Larry such a hard time?”  Some of us are bald, some of us are not.  Some of us are Jewish (okay most) some are not, but we’re united in our appreciation for careful deliberation and consideration of the little miniscule things in life.

This week, a hapless pubescent Girl Scout gets her first period amidst a cookie push at the David house and Larry ends up forced to read her Tampon directions from the other side of the bathroom door in a scene akin to the finale of The Hurt Locker.  As a result of his heroics, he ends up ostracized, out two Dodger tickets and the target of a Girl Scout troop’s wrath.

Here’s hoping Larry muscled the door closed, after managing to gank a few boxes of Samoas and the day ended with he Leon riding off into the sunset on a motorcycle, with Leon driving of course, because, as was explained this week, Jews do not ride motorcycles.  A new neighborhood full of angry neighbors, unruly dogs, and god knows what else, awaits, as do we, patiently for next week.

The post Jews Watching Curb Your Enthusiasm: Girl Scouts, Ersatz Jews, And Buffet Fine Print appeared first on Jewcy.