Chanukah is a great holiday for kids. Games, fried foods, lighting candles— add in the Americanization of the holiday with gifts, and it’s an easy favorite.

Plus, there’s the simple narrative of the holiday— the dual miracles of the impossible war, and the oil that burned for eight days. But there’s lots we don’t bother to tell kids about the holiday, that, I have learned, really piques their attention. Use your best judgment— don’t tell a kindergartener about a man being crushed to death, for example. And some of the fascinating geopolitics might be a bit sophisticated for even the most precocious of tykes. But here are some great ways to make a Jewish child question their entire holiday experience up to this point:

1. The story really starts with Alexander the Great.

OK, you do need a kid nerdy enough to appreciate the historical connection, but if they’re Jewish, the odds aren’t necessarily against you. The villain of our story after all, Antiochus, was really Antiochus the IV. The kids almost certainly won’t know how the Seleucids came to be in possession of ancient Judea— when Alexander’s generals divided up their late leader’s empire like it was a giant cake.

2. Judah the Maccabee died during the War. In fact, most of the brothers died.

Our heroes are the sons of the priest Mattathias, especially the middle of the five— Judah. What we don’t bother to tell kids is that Judah didn’t live to see the end of the war, after walking into a bloodbath rather retreating. Watch their eyes grow wide as you break it to them. And he was far from the only core member of the gang to die, which brings us to:

3. One word: Eleazer.

Judah’s brother Eleazar had a notoriously sticky end. In battle, the Syrian-Greeks brought out elephants, because if you had an elephant, wouldn’t you? Anyway, Eleazar charged the elephant, spearing it in the stomach. What happened next in retrospect was sort of obvious; the dying elephant fell up Eleazar, killing him.

The best part? The Jews didn’t even win that battle.

4. The post-victory government imploded pretty much immediately.

We tell kids proudly how the Maccabees won the day and ejected Seleucid rule. We usually end the story right there. Admit to the child in your life that attempts to create a stable government in the aftermath of the war lasted like 70 years and then collapsed in a heap when the corrupt monarchy ended in everyone assassinating one another like it was Game of Thrones. (Why is a kid watching Game of Thrones!?) Don’t worry kids, you still get gelt.

5. Chanukah is pretty much Sukkot.

Listen, you don’t need to tell a kid that the miracle of the oil “may not have happened,” unless you want to have a huge conversation about the evolution of Judaism and the way we create and then codify faith-based narratives. But you can also gently point out that Chanukah is the same length as Sukkot— the Maccabees were fighting so long and hard for the Temple that they had to put off the High Holy Day’s celebration until the winter. What will they do with this information? That’s up to their tiny little minds.

6. Giving Chanukah presents is only because of Christmas envy.

Sorry, kids. We know you want to insist to your gentile friends that Chanukah is just as good as Christmas, but the presents you so covet are because your great-grandparent immigrants saw the Macy’s holiday windows one too many times and snapped. Back in the old country, you would get a kopek and a potato, and be grateful.

And so, blow a child’s mind this holiday season! Let us know how it goes, and you’re welcome.

Image: Gustave Doré’s “The Death of Eleazar” via Wikimedia.

The post How to Blow a Kid’s Mind About Chanukah appeared first on Jewcy.

Looking for a fun, easy Rosh Hashanah baking project for the little human(s) in your life? May I present the humble Australian party classic, the Honey Joy. It’s sort of a cross between a Cornflake cookie and a Rice Krispie treat, and it tastes just like it sounds: sweet and happy.

Honey Joys are de rigueur at Aussie birthday parties, and they’re super-easy to make. (In fact, it was the very first recipe I made on my own.) Kids aged 8 and up can wing it solo, but they might need a grown-up assist at the oven end of the business. Littler ones will love helping older siblings with the measuring and mixing. And everyone will schep nachas when these are served up at the Rosh Hashanah table or as a shul treat.

Let’s get this sugar high show on the road!

Ingredients:

4 cups cornflakes
1 tbsp honey
⅓ cup sugar (you can probably use a little less, adjust to taste)
3 oz. butter or margarine

Directions:

1. Pre-heat oven to 300 degrees. Line two cupcake trays with 24 cupcake liners. (Cookie trays are fine too.)

2. Melt butter, sugar, and honey together in saucepan until frothy. (Kids can do this in the microwave.)

3. Combine liquids with cornflakes in big bowl. Mix together with wooden spoon. Spoon the mixture into the cupcake cups.

4. Bake Honey Joys at 300 degrees for 10 minutes. Remove from oven. Optional: top with coconut flakes, sprinkles, decorative cake balls.

5. Let cool. Eat!

(Image: Clara Alim, via Flickr)

The post Honey Joys: Easy Rosh Hashanah Recipe for Kids appeared first on Jewcy.