The tsar of dream painters, Marc Chagall is today’s birthday boy. In his honor, we explored his confident stroke by way of one of our favorite analyses, Freud’s deconstruction of phallic dream symbols. Exploring the breadth of his work, we find that he exhibits more girth than dirth in that department. Taking a stroll through a random gallery of his dreamscapes, we can be sure that he was an alpha male who was king pimp in the shorts.

Lesson 1: The number three symbolizes the holiest of trinities, the male sexual organ. Check out the triangles on that guy and his stiff tower.

Lesson 2: Symbols of the phallus are easily spotted in objects similar to it in form, particularly hard, jutting things like steeples, umbrellas, trees, mountains, candles, and flutes. Man, Marc—you showed Chicago who’s really boss in the Art Institute’s prized blue windows.

Lesson 3: Objects that can penetrate the body (but shouldn’t) are also telltale: scythes, knives, guns, violin bows perhaps…

Lesson 4: Mandango Marc also struts his stuff by way of substituting with symbols from which water runs like fountains and long, long rivers.

Lesson 5: Probably what we know him best for are the finest things of dreams: that which elevates like an erection—flying couples, Pegasus, Jesus, and, well, cocks.

Happy Birthday, Marc! We finally acknowledge you for all your glory.

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