Listen, we all need good news. And that can be rather hard to come by these days, especially if you’re, oh, I don’t know, a journalist who covers Jewish topics, and for every hopeful story about Jewish-Muslim solidarity you have to read ten about the White House dabbling in softcore Holocaust denial.

It’s not that Jewcy hasn’t been posting political articles (like this one, and this one, and this one). But we needed a break today.

And, like usual, Beyoncé Giselle Knowles-Carter has perfect timing with an important announcement. The Queen took to Instagram today to let us know that Blue Ivy is about to be a big sister— twice:

We would like to share our love and happiness. We have been blessed two times over. We are incredibly grateful that our family will be growing by two, and we thank you for your well wishes. – The Carters

Blessed, indeed. Just look at that photo. Beatific.

Of course, we already knew that Beyoncé is a matriarch of Biblical proportions, and this clinches it. To quote Genesis 25:23 (we admit somewhat out of context):

“Two nations are in thy womb.”

We do hope they get along better than Jacob and Esau, and that Beyoncé has an easier pregnancy than Rivkah did. But Rivkah is a fascinating figure— arguably the most proactive, badass of the Biblical matriarchs. If Bey were to emulate anyone in Genesis, it would be her. After all, both are devoted wives, mothers, women who know their own mind, holders of the record for most Grammy nominations by a female artist, etc.

Anyway, a tip for Jews wishing to congratulate Queen Bey— while few would take offense at being wished “Mazel Tov,” the proper response to news that someone is pregnant is “B’Sha’a Tovah.” It literally means, “At a good hour.” As in, let’s not tempt fate by congratulating good fortune preemptively, and may the baby (babies!!) come at the right time.

If this article still isn’t Jewish enough for you, we shall now express our feelings via gifs of Jewish actor Winona Ryder from her recent amazing facial expression experience:

B’Sha’a Tovah, Bey.

Image via Instagram. Gifs via Giphy and Buzzfeed.

The post Beyoncé Expecting Twins; Is Like Rivka appeared first on Jewcy.

Pregnant? Wanting to announce the news to friends, family, and a bunch of complete strangers on the internet? Paul Rudd is here to help! The They Came Together actor, bat mitzvah DJ, and long-standing heartthrob to 30-something women the world over recently helped a random couple make their pregnancy announcement go viral.

Uproxx reports:

Lucky enough to bump into Rudd while expecting a child, this handsome couple seized the moment by enlisting the aid of the ageless wonder, asking him to hold up a perfectly appropriate and referential sign (because he was in Knocked Up, you see) to help break their baby news to friends and family.

Much better than posing for a puntastic pic with a jar of tomato sauce, I guess.

(Image via Imgur)

The post Paul Rudd is Here to Help With Your Pregnancy Announcements appeared first on Jewcy.

Mila Kunis is pregnant! Which means—as many Hollywood observers have astutely noted—Ashton Kutcher is going to be a father! Not since ScarJo’s pregnancy reveal three weeks ago has a celebrity baby generated so much excitement.

The newly engaged couple haven’t actually confirmed the news (wouldn’t it be funny if this was just a giant scam perpetuated by e-online, the Facebook trending bar, and our insatiable appetite for celebrity gossip? YES), but in the meantime, it’s fun to speculate about the ridiculously beautiful and funny child they might bring into the world.

Congrats!

The post Obligatory Mila Kunis Pregnancy Post! appeared first on Jewcy.

Word on the street is that ScarJo is preggo! (I know, that’s an absolutely atrocious rhyme, but I couldn’t resist.) The 29-year-old actress has been engaged to her partner Romain Dauriac, a French journalist, since September. She was previously married to actor Ryan Reynolds—they separated in 2010, and divorced in 2011.

In December 2013, Johansson told the UK’s Daily Mail that it “would be nice” to have a family, but that she was waiting for the right time: “I think you have to plan it like anything else. At some point it is something I look forward to. I am fortunate in that I have had a long career–20 years–that has been very diverse. So, you know, picking a time to plan a family feels like something that I could do and not feel as though I was missing out.”

Looks like the time is now. B’sha’ah tovah, Scarlett!

Here’s a recent pic of the parents-to-be looking very normcore:

See also: Scarlett Johansson’s Super Bowl SodaStream Debut Is Official

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