We love Dr. Ruth Westheimer, the 84-year-old sex therapist (and former Haganah sniper) who dishes out daily tips from her sassy Twitter account, @AskDrRuth. We figured she’d be the best person to ask for some Jewcy advice for Valentine’s Day, and we were right.

Here are Dr. Ruth’s five tips for a steamy Valentine’s Day:

1. If you think you need Kate Middleton’s nose to find a date for Valentine’s Day then you’ll probably be disappointed. Not in your new nose, maybe, but in that empty slot next to February 14 in your calendar. Yes, appearance matters, but not as much as you think—and the more you think it matters the less likely you are to be the type of person that the opposite sex will find attractive.

2. Valentine’s Day is really short for St. Valentine’s Day, so Jews don’t have to pay as much attention—but if you meet the right partner at the deli counter, go for it. Just remember while 30 percent of couples got engaged on Valentine’s Day, 40 percent had their biggest fight!

3. Here’s one reason why I don’t believe in Friends with Benefits: how do such friends celebrate Valentine’s Day?

4. Restaurants are crowded on Valentine’s Day. If you really want a romantic meal, order in, put some candles around your place, and play some soft music.

5. Guys should know that gifts brought on Valentine’s evening don’t have the same force as those sent earlier. It takes longer for women to become aroused so flowers sent in the morning will have more time to work their magic. Of course a pair of silky red undies offered that morning might just never get put on!

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