Almost two years ago, I got the crazy notion that it would be a good idea to write my own original translation of the Hebrew Bible. And, since the Torah is read aloud in synagogues each Shabbat, my translation had to be read publicly, in front of a live audience. And since it’s the 2010s, it also had to be recorded as a podcast. The show started on October 15, 2012 at the Parkside Lounge with writer Joe Winkler in front of a curious crowd of friends and family.

22 months later, in front of a packed house at Manhattan’s Beauty Bar, I put to rest the first book of my translation. To celebrate, I collected all my previous guests (either live or prerecorded) to read pieces of the trippy blessings Jacob gives his sons in the final chapters of Genesis. Anchored by the reading of the very talented Julie Sugar, it was a heck of a night, all preserved in podcast form.

Before the reading began, there was a moment of reflection. Reversing how this usually goes, Julie took on the interviewer role, and asked me about my translating, “Has anything surprised you about this process, about your relationship to all this stuff, over the last two years?” My answer began:

I’ve been surprised at how close I’ve gotten to it. Like, I think when we started doing this, and I’ve listened to the older episodes somewhat recently, I was a lot angrier about it and a lot like “ah, this is ridiculous.”

To hear what changed, my first memory of Torah, my thoughts on the concept of God, and, of course, the jam-packed reading in this extra-long episode, listen here:

Bringing this show to life has been an incredible journey, during which I’ve learned more than I ever expected. At this crucial juncture, I’m asking listeners to partner with me to generate the funds to keep the show going. That’s why I’m launching an Indiegogo campaign to cover the cost of the show and a whole lot more. Below, you’ll find a video where I make my pitch. If you’d like to donate or share the campaign, please visit the Indiegogo page here to become a partner in this project.

What do you think of Jacob’s blessings and of Genesis so far? Let us know in the comments.

David will be hosting a public mocking of “Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat” at Beauty Bar (231 E. 14th Street) at 8:00 PM on July 28, and will begin Book Two of his translation at the same location on August 25.

Jewcy is the proud (internet) co-host of OMGWTFBIBLE. Read more about the project here, and listen to previous episodes here.

Image: Jacob Blessing the Sons of Joseph, Rembrandt

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Michael Malice went to Pyongang, sifted through piles of English-language propaganda, and wrote “Dear Reader: The Unauthorized Autobiography of Kim Jong Il,”a first-person account of North Korean history written in the voice of its late leader. He also joined me at Beauty Bar on Monday night to read a few chapters of OMGWTFBIBLE. Which was more terrifying? You’ll have to listen to find out.

This month on the show, we read about Joseph’s revelation of his identity to his brothers (and what a revelation it was!) and the anticlimactic aftermath. We learned about the not-quite-democratic political system Joseph imposed on famine-stricken Egypt. How does it compare with Kim Jong Il’s North Korea? Michael Malice has the scoop.

What do you think of Joseph’s decisions? Listen to the podcast and let us know!

David Tuchman translated the Tanakh as a comedy and called it OMGWTFBIBLE. Each month on his podcast, he calls up a different guest to read as many chapters of OMGWTFBIBLE as they can while they both make fun of it.

Jewcy is the proud (internet) co-host of OMGWTFBIBLE. Read more about the project here, and listen to previous episodes here.

Also! Big news! On June 23 OMGWTFBIBLE will be wrapping up Book One with a technicolor reunion show featuring every previous guest at Beauty Bar at 8:00pm. 

The post OMGWTFBIBLE podcast: Author Michael Malice on Joseph vs. Kim Jong Il appeared first on Jewcy.

Leah Vincent may be best known for her shocking escape from a restrictive Orthodox community in Cut Me Loose, her leaving-the-fold memoir, but since its release, she’s been working to carve out a space for less traditional approaches to sacred text. In The Forward this week, she wrote about her struggles approaching Jewish scripture and her attempt to reclaim the Shema as a feminist prayer.

This month, Leah stopped by OMGWTFBIBLE to read the continuation of Joseph’s story. Together, we dove into Joseph’s deception of his brothers and discussed what happens to families when people push each other away. Oh, and there were jokes.

At the core of the conversation was the question of whether, sitting on the throne in Egypt, Joseph is hiding himself or is finally living authentically. Listen above to hear our thoughts, then let us know what you think.

The next live recording of OMGWTFBIBLE will be at Beauty Bar at 8:00PM on May 26 and will feature author Michael Malice (Dear Reader: The Unauthorized Autobiography of Kim Jong Il).

David Tuchman translated the Tanakh as a comedy and called it OMGWTFBIBLE. Each month on his podcast, he calls up a different guest to read as many chapters of OMGWTFBIBLE as they can while they both make fun of it.

Jewcy is the proud (internet) co-host of OMGWTFBIBLE. Read more about the project here, and listen to previous episodes here.

The post OMGWTFBIBLE podcast: Leah Vincent on Joseph and Fractured Families appeared first on Jewcy.

Rabbi Joshua Yuter does not skirt controversy. Whether he’s criticizing Rabbi Hershel Shachter during the recent kerfuffle over women wearing tefillin in Yeshiva day schools, calling out Rabbi Avi Weiss of Yeshivat Chovevei Torah from the left, or partly justifying his recent decision to make Aliyah by stating he is “simply not Zionistic enough for the American rabbinate,” Rabbi Yuter is not afraid to speak his mind. Nor was he afraid to join me for an episode of OMGWTFBIBLE.

When we started reading, Joseph was stuck in jail. By the end of the episode, through some very unlikely dream analysis, Joseph ends up running the show in Egypt. Along the way, Rabbi Yuter and I discussed an Orthodox approach to Biblical criticism, what Pharaoh’s birthday parties must have been like, and alternate analyses of Pharaoh’s dreams.

Here’s my attempt to modernize the interpretation of those dreams:

At that point, people saw dreams as either telling about a thing that had happened, reflecting a thing that’s going on right now, or as predicting the future. And people immediately say “OK what does this dream predict?” Which is not something that we do. Now we tend to think of dreams as reflecting a vulnerability, reflecting our unconscious. So I thought about that and tried to figure out what, if we were to use that kind of analysis, what Pharaoh’s unconscious might be saying.

What was Rabbi Yuter’s analysis? Listen to find out.

p.s.! The next live recording of OMGWTFBIBLE will be at Beauty Bar (231 E. 14th Street) at 8:00PM on April 28 and will feature author Leah Vincent (“Cut Me Loose”).

David Tuchman translated the Tanach as a comedy and called it OMGWTFBIBLE. Each month on his podcast, he calls up a different guest to read as many chapters of OMGWTFBIBLE as they can while they both make fun of it.

Jewcy is the proud (internet) co-host of OMGWTFBIBLE. Read more about the project here, and listen to previous episodes here.

The post OMGWTFBIBLE podcast: Joseph! Pharoah! Jung! Dreams! appeared first on Jewcy.

When Ari Mandel left his Hasidic upbringing, his atheism was so strong, he tried to sell his spot in heaven on eBay and only kept Shabbos in exchange for $1000 for charity. In the most recent episode of OMGWTFBIBLE, I convinced Ari to do what no rabbi could: read the Torah.

This month, we read some of the more, ahem, sexually explicit passages in Genesis. First, Judah’s family is torn asunder by the apparently irresistible allure of the seductive Tamar. Then, Joseph, house-slave to a man named Potiphar in Egypt, is very definitely sexually harassed by his boss’s wife. Along the way, we shared maybe a little too much about our time in Yeshiva day school.

In an attempt to sum things up, I noticed a parallel between Judah’s sex romp and the fall of Adam and Eve:

The story reminded me of the story of Eden, or Gan Eden, where God, or Yehovah, tells Adam not to eat from the fruit and Chava interprets it as “you must not touch of the fruit of the Tree of Knowledge of Life and Death or you will die.” And the snake uses that additional layer of stricture, or of banning, in order to convince her to actually eat. Because she reaches out, touches the tree, and she doesn’t die. And then she’s like “ok, I guess I can eat now.” And that’s what leads her to eat of the fruit of the Tree of Knowledge of Life and Death.”

What does this have to do with Judah and his sons Onan and Er? Listen and find out.

David Tuchman translated the Tanach as a comedy and called it OMGWTFBIBLE. Each month on his podcast, he calls up a different guest to read as many chapters of OMGWTFBIBLE as they can while they both make fun of it.

Jewcy is the proud (internet) co-host of OMGWTFBIBLE. Read more about the project here.

The post OMGWTFBIBLE Podcast: Joseph, the Irresistible Allure of Tamar, and Stories from Yeshiva Day School appeared first on Jewcy.