Lipa Schmeltzer, everyone’s favorite Hassid had a pretty busy week, what with his haggadah dropping and all. In between seders, yom tovim and many a board of matza, Lipa, thanks God, still had time to tweet. While this is only a select few of what proves to be the most grammatically incorrect account on Twitter, these should give you the gist of just how busy Lipa was this week. So busy, in fact, that he did not even have time to look up how to spell "mountains," and therefore spelt it wrong twice, each time in a more creative way than the next.
Ah, the mountens, eh? Wonder if Lipa can spell the ever-challenging word "Appalachian"… what about something as simple as "Rocky"…wondering if he can even spell "Catskills"… to this I correctly spell "Oy Vey."
Unsure if mountens was the correct spelling of mountains, Lipa tried one more time to get it right with "montence." Something is telling me that "montence" is a long shot, probably because the "ence" sound does not even exist in the word "mountains," but why not give it a go?
And if that wasn’t enough, Lipa informed us all about his show in Brooklyn. And when might you ask is this show taking place? "Tomarow," tweets Lipa, still managing to spell Brooklyn correctly – Let’s not give him too much credit for that one though, Brooklyn is practically a Yiddish word.
Lipa tweets some more and we find out how he plans to spend his Passover…at the mitzvah circus!
Our first reaction to this was "Ooh! the circus?! We love the circus!" our reaction, after giving it some thought, quickly became "What in God’s name is a Mitzvah Circus?" We let our imaginations run wild. Suddenly a mitzvah circus was a grand event where a ringleader, clowns, animals, acrobats, flame throwers and like talent performed drastic mitzvot like sending away a mother bird before taking her eggs – all in front of an audience.
This week was packed with more exciting events for Lipa than just the Mitzvah Circus. Lipa celebrated his friend’s birthday and was given permission by the courts of Airmont, NY to build his own shul on his own property. In only a short period of time, Casa de Lipa will officially become Shull de Lipa … and by "Shull," Lipa means Shul.
It’s Mo Kiss’ birthday! We at the Jewcy HQ wish you a lofty Mazal Tov, Mr. Kiss. But then we got to thinking…Mo Money, Mo Problems… Mo Kiss? Is he a famous rapper? A famous gigolo? The Jewish version of Ivana Humpalot? I doubt we’ll ever know since we know Lipa can’t spell enough words to explain it to us…but apparently, he’s the best.