Tell Us Your Misdeeds in Jewcy’s Atonement Forum

Once, a couple months ago, I was sitting on the subway next to two empty seats when an overweight woman got on the train with her extremely rotund child. He looked to be about eight, but it was hard to tell because he was enormous — much bigger than me, though that’s not much of an accomplishment. (I’ve been waiting for my growth spurt since sixth grade.) There was no way both mother and son could fit in the two seats next to me; each one required at least a seat and a half. A half, that is, of my seat. They stared at me. I stared at them. Normally, when I see a parent and child on the train, I get up. It’s only fair—I’m young, unencumbered, strong of calf. But I couldn’t get past the fact that all three of us could be seated happily if both mom and kid hadn’t been so supersized. A lot of things contribute to childhood obesity — genes, income, lifestyle. Not all of them are controllable, especially when you’re eight years old. Still, sometimes on the subway at the end of the day a seat starts to feel like a precious commodity, one you’d guard with your life. Wasn’t it, like, abusing the resources for these people to demand more than their allotted share? Is one still required to give up one’s seat for a child when the child is the size of a small ox? In the end, I stayed put. But obviously I feel kind of guilty because I’m obsessing about it three months later. As such, I’d like to publicly apologize—and to announce the opening of Jewcy’s atonement forum. Haunted by similar petty incidences of poor behavior? Better yet, haunted by much bigger, juicier misdeeds? Tell us about them (anonymously, natch) in honor of the upcoming Day of Atonement. We want something like Craigslist’s Missed Connections in Jewish-sin form. Ultimately we might even round up and feature the best ones, but only if you guys don’t hold back…