Ain mol a saichel, dos tsvaiteh mol chain, dem dritten mol git men in di tsain: The first time it’s smart, the second time it’s cute, the third time you get a sock in the teeth.

ARIES (MARCH 21-APRIL 20): Happy Astrological New Year!

The Aries ram finds its place in Jewish history as an instrument of salvation—instead of sacrificing his son Isaac, Abraham sacrificed a ram in Isaac’s place. The rebirth of the sun is also an important Aries myth, and its symbolism of renewal is inherent to the story of Passover, which is determined by the spring equinox, signaling our release from winter’s bondage.

Aries, a cardinal fire sign, is the first sign of the zodiac, and, as the head of the year, it rules the head and face. Therefore, you are the most forward-looking and self-assertive sign of the zodiac. Ruled by Warrior Mars (the planet named after the Roman god of war), Aries are often impetuous, reckless, and above all, action-oriented. Exceedingly ambitious, headstrong, and impulsive, you’re always full of new schemes and ideas. But Aries can also be a bit combative at times—prone to extremes and to jealousy. Nevertheless, your quiet time is just as crucial to your well-being—you need to recharge your batteries even more than the rest of us!

Aries are all about truth, and are never at a loss for the right word. Your dynamic directness must be softened by humor and charm, though, which you have in spades. You are all about action, starting new things and getting them done. While your mantra may be ‘No guts no glory,’ keep in mind that your opponents have bring their own strengths to the table. Do your best to avoid being perceived as a loose cannon: Mit rugzeh fort men nit veit (with anger you don’t get too far). 

Famous Aries Jews: Harry Houdini, Matthew Broderick, Gloria Steinem, Leonard Nimoy, William Shatner, Sarah Jessica Parker, Paul Rudd, James Caan, Seth Rogan, James Franco, Rhea Perlman, Alan Arkin, Paul Reiser, Stephen Sondheim, Jennifer Grey,, Marc Jacobs, Barry Levinson, Perry Farrell, Dan Clowes, Lew Wasserman, Erica Jong, Serge Gainsbourg, Sarah Michelle Gellar, Kate Hudson, Ron Perlman, Ellen Barkin, Amanda Bynes, David Blaine.

TAURUS (APRIL 21-MAY 20): Your mind, body and spirit fuse this month, giving you insight into the deepest reaches of your character. You’ll slow down to your preferred laidik-gaier (idler, loafer) state-of-being when Venus enters its home sign, Taurus, April 15 to May 9. 

GEMINI (MAY 21-JUNE 20): With your ruling planet Mercury finally direct, and transiting through opportunistic Aries, from April 13 to May 1, you’ll have plenty of chances to increase your popularity—if such a thing is even possible! Zhu met (mir) in kop—the buzzing in your mind—is amplified by Aries, a fire sign, which implores you to move impulsively from one thing to the next. Take a deep breath—and don’t quit your day job.

CANCER (JUNE 21-JULY 20): Long time no see, you lobbus (little monster). While you’re most comfortable nesting at home, you will be confronted by more professional responsibilities in the coming weeks. With the new moon in Aries on April 10, however, you are encouraged to face your sheidim (demons), get out into the world and try something different.

LEO (JULY 21-AUGUST 20): Wild hearts can’t be broken, but your current hartsvaitik (heartache) is the sneaking suspicion that your skills aren’t being used effectively. If you’re just waiting around for someone to take notice, you could be waiting forever. Be true to your bad self and have confidence that your work will speak for itself. In the meantime, perhaps a vacation is in order? Travel in good health (for gesunterhait), you menschy monarchs.  

VIRGO (AUGUST 21-SEPTEMBER 20): While industrious Virgos have the reputation of being kuni leml (a nerd), try to cut loose a bit this month. This doesn’t mean you have to compromise your values or sense of tznius (modesty). A gentleman doesn’t ask and a lady doesn’t tell, but with your ruling planet Mercury direct and in fiery, impulsive Aries, you’ll want to shout your Virgo verve from the rooftops! 

LIBRA (SEPTEMBER 21-OCTOBER 20): When Venus enters her home sign, Taurus, from April 15 to May 9, you’ll want to indulge in the finer things. However, you may feel compelled to clean up the shudden (big mess) you’ve made of your love life. Love is a naidlechech (rare thing), and you don’t want it to slip through your fingers. Perhaps it’s time to take a page from Libra Nanny Fine’s book: “It don’t mean a thing if you ain’t got that ring.” 

SCORPIO (OCTOBER 21-NOVEMBER 20): Scorpios live by the credo di beste rede iz di vos men halt nit—the best speech is the one you don’t make. But with your ruling planet Pluto retrograde from April 12 to September 20, your power struggles and their attendant pressures should begin to ease. Your passions and desires—as well as your temper—could reach their breaking point. But don’t worry: what happens in Scorpio stays in Scorpio.

SAGITTARIUS (NOVEMBER 21-DECEMBER 20): As the great Sagittarian nebbish Woody Allen once said, “If you’re not failing every now and again, it’s a sign you’re not doing anything very innovative.” This month, stars are aligning to get you up and out there—take some risks already! Sagittarians have, if nothing else, an open mind. Remain true to your inquisitive self and remember: az me fregt, blonzhet men nisht (if one asks, one does not err).

CAPRICORN (DECEMBER 21-JANUARY 20): Stuck in the middle of your ruling planet Saturn’s retrograde period, resolving old issues has forced you to take a long, hard at your truest self. If it seems to you that the more things change the more they stay the same, maybe it’s time to really shake things up once and for all—folg mikh a gayng! (that’s no small task!). Finding a balance between home and work is a Capricorn’s eternal struggle.  

AQUARIUS (JANUARY 21-FEBRUARY 20): Aquarians tend to keep their emotions bottled up, which always leads to trouble. Tsum shtain zol men klogen nor nit bei zich zol men trogen—better pour out your troubles to a stone, but don’t carry them within yourself. Opening up to others allows you to appreciate the variety of perspectives that may come your way. While aleyn iz di neshome reyn—being single has its advantages; lit., alone, one’s soul is pure—it is through your relationships with others than you’ll learn something valuable about yourself. 

PISCES (FEBRUARY 21-MARCH 20): Planets moving out of your sign this month may appear to darken your doorstep, but di tseit brengt vunden un hailt vunden—time brings wounds and heals them. With all of the pressures of the last few years, you feel like you’ve lost the courage of your conviction—and the confidence you need to make the right choices. Get the money, honey; and zei nit kain vyzoso!—don’t be an idiot!—ask for help if you need it. 

What’s Your Sign?
Pisces, the Dual-Natured Water Sign
Aquarius, Sign of Contradictions
Capricorn, the Cardinal Earth Sign
Sagittarius, the Adventurous Archer
Stinging Scorpio
Lovely, Lawful Libra
Virgo, the Anxious Maiden
Leo, King of the Jungle

The post Jewcy Horoscopes: Aries, the Dynamic, Headstrong Fire Sign appeared first on Jewcy.

Oif a meisseh fregt men kain kasheh nit: Don’t ask questions about fairy tales.

PISCES (FEBRUARY 21-MARCH 20): Pisces, symbolized by two fish swimming in opposite directions, exemplifies the dual nature of this mutable water sign. One fish swims toward the spiritual—the world of the dream, the unconscious mind—while the other fish swims toward the material world.

Fish-themed Judaic tales include Jonah and the whale and the Leviathan. In 6 B.C., a Jupiter-Saturn conjunction in Pisces even gave Jewish astrologers hope for a messiah.
 
Perhaps the most romantic and certainly the most intuitive of all the signs of the zodiac, you can be weak-willed in matters of the heart. Wise, sage givers of good advice, you are sensitive to beauty and can be overwhelmed by the feelings of others. Your heightened psychic awareness gives you a keen ability to suffer with others—this combined with your patience and listening skills makes you an excellent therapist and friend, but can have the ill effect of distancing you from your own life and feelings. With an innate receptiveness to everything that’s going on around you, it can be hard to see where others end and you begin.

While Passover begins on the day of the first full moon after the vernal equinox (the cusp between Pisces and Aries), Purim (February 23-24) is in many ways associated with Pisces—the Hebrew month of Adar corresponds with Pisces, and Purim itself has many fish themes.

The new moon on March 11 will be in Pisces; on this day there will be six heavenly bodies in your sign: Mercury, Mars, Venus, your ruling planet, Neptune, and the moon as well as the sun. With so many planets in Pisces, you’ll have the world at your feet (Pisces rules the feet)—lucky you!

Famous Pisces Jews: Gilbert Gottfried, Samm Levine, Bugsy Siegel, Rob Reiner, Carl Reiner, Ron Jeremy, Albert Einstein, Lou Reed, Billy Crystal, David Cronenberg, Jerry Lewis, Philip Roth, Yitzhak Rabin, Shalom Alecheim, Rashi, Renee Taylor, Elizabeth Taylor (converted), Joe Lieberman, Zeppo Marx, Kurt Weill, Ira Glass, Harry Winston, Diane Arbus, Rashida Jones, Judith Butler, Chelsea Handler.

ARIES (MARCH 21-APRIL 20): “Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus” was once the catchall phrase to explain the eternal debate—but hey, the 1990s called, and they want their dichotomy back: Mars and Venus are two faces of the same coin. Your ruling planet Mars returns to your sign on March 11, where it will stay until April 20, while Venus enters your sign on the spring equinox, balancing out aggressive Mars with its lovely light and helping you roll with the punches.

TAURUS (APRIL 21-MAY 20): Your ruling planet Venus will be in compassionate Pisces from February 25 to March 21, inspiring you with dreams of a grand romance. But don’t tempt the gods—zindik nit—focus what you need to do for yourself first before succumbing to the gantseh tsimmes (big confusion) that love can bring. Only you can take control of your life, and outside forces often serve as distractions from doing what you need to do.

GEMINI (MAY 21-JUNE 20): Gemini shiksa goddess Marilyn Monroe said, “it is better to be hated for what you are than loved for what you are not,” and you should take her message to heart. Effusive Geminis are rarely unlovable, but your mazik (troublemaker) tendencies may make you seem like a stranger in a strange land if you fight against them. With your ruling planet Mercury in retrograde until March 17 and in dreamy Pisces until April 13, you will be compelled to confront your spiritual side—which you may have been willfully ignoring for fear of losing yourself. 

CANCER (JUNE 21-JULY 20): Gossiping is the worst habit and the biggest calumny—Loshen horeh iz di ergsteh mideh un gresteh tsoreh—and if anyone’s guilty of it, it’s you. We all know that old habits die hard, but with Mercury in retrograde you may want to watch what you say a bit more carefully. The new moon in your fellow water sign—creative, free-wheeling Pisces—on March 11 pit the two sides of your nature against each other. Loose lips may sink ships, but loosening yourself up won’t do anyone any harm.

LEO (JULY 21-AUGUST 20): No matter how hard you try to be inscrutable, the hitsik (hothead) wildcat within you betrays your true nature every time. Temper, temper you imperious beasts! With so many planets in even-keeled Pisces, you just may get the balm you need to keep moving forward. Remember, if you can’t do as you wish, do as you can—Az me ken nit vi me vil, tut men vi me ken.

VIRGO (AUGUST 21-SEPTEMBER 20): All eyes will be on you with the full moon in your sign on February 25. This is a great time to allow yourself a moment in the spotlight for once; after all, too much modesty is half conceit—tsu fil anives iz a halber shtolts. However, with Mercury in retrograde (and in your polar opposite sign, Pisces), you’ll still do well to conduct yourself with the reticence and charm you know best. That does mean you can’t get all farpitzed and let the world bask in your glow.

LIBRA (SEPTEMBER 21-OCTOBER 20): Venus is drifting through languorous Pisces through March 21, encouraging you to patteren tseit (lounge around, waste time) more than usual. This combined with your capacity for dissimulation conceals your true intentions and desires. Libras may have the reputation for being lighthearted lovers, but the mask you wear may be doing you more harm than you think. While it’s great that you can keep a positive mental attitude, suppressing your darker side keeps you from letting others into your heart.

SCORPIO (OCTOBER 21-NOVEMBER 20): Your reputation precedes you, saucy Scorpio—you’ll get what you want by hook or by crook. Oi, a shkandal! (Oh, what a scandal!). While you may not be as thoroughly unscrupulous as your sign suggests, with so many planets in Pisces, another water sign immersed in the waters of the unconscious, your hulyen (hellraiser) impulses could get the better of you. Reign in the danger, but never deny your true nature.

SAGITTARIUS (NOVEMBER 21–DECEMBER 20): With your ruling planet Jupiter still in mischievous Gemini and so many planets in dreamy Pisces, you’d be wise to guard your saykhel (common sense) closely. Surrounding yourself with mamoshes (people of substance) may help you avoid finding yourself at the wrong place at the wrong time. However, if you have a tendency to lead others on, at least have the decency to operate with transparency: if you’re all talk, make sure your partners-in-crime know it. No one likes a con artist!

CAPRICORN (DECEMBER 21–JANUARY 20): Your mantra has been Me krechts, me geht veyter—I complain and I keep going—for longer than you’d care to admit. Saturn’s retrograde through July 7 forces you to confront, and hopefully resolve, issues that have been plaguing you. If you can face your demons head on, you may find that the wild card’s been up your sleeve all along, and the fact that you can keep surprising yourself should be more than enough to get yourself going again, you alter bok (old goat).

AQUARIUS (JANUARY 21-FEBRUARY 20): If you’ve been feeling more kalamutneh (dreary, gloomy, troubled) than usual, you may worry that you’ve reached an impasse in your love life. Fear not, this deadlock may resolve itself at the eleventh hour. Until then, you may just have to grit your teeth and accept that to leiden (suffer) is your fate right now. Focus on all the great things you’ve got going on rather than the bad hand life seems to have dealt you. After all, as Ru Paul says, “If you don’t love yourself, how the hell you gonna love somebody else?”

What’s Your Sign?
Aquarius, Sign of Contradictions
Capricorn, the Cardinal Earth Sign
Sagittarius, the Adventurous Archer
Stinging Scorpio
Lovely, Lawful Libra
Virgo, the Anxious Maiden
Leo, King of the Jungle

(Art by Margarita Korol)

The post Jewcy Horoscopes: Pisces, the Dual-Natured Water Sign (Feb. 21-March 20) appeared first on Jewcy.

A sach mentshen zehen, nor vainik fun zai farshtai’en: Many people see things but few understand them.

AQUARIUS (JANUARY 21—FEBRUARY 20):

Ruled by wild and erratic Uranus, Aquarians are associated with inspiration and originality. Your symbol, the water-bearer, is a bit misleading—you’re not, in fact, a water sign, but rather an air sign. But unlike fellow air signs Libra and Gemini, Aquarius is a fixed sign, meaning you possess the intellectual acumen and curiosity of the others but aren’t nearly as mercurial.

Aquarius is also the sign of contradictions. Before the discovery of Uranus in 1781, Saturn was your ruler, representing order and conformity. Uranus, with its unusual rotation and orbit, rules rebellion, risk, and individuality. The planet is associated with invention and innovation, as well as a latent ability to perceive the future—which is what it means to be at the dawning of the Age of Aquarius.

Aquarians are patient, intuitive, devoted, and dependable, yet drawn to the unconventional. Your clear-headed determination and knack for reason make you an excellent reformer. But your detachment from your emotions and dispassionate approach to relationships—as well as your keen memory for detail—often cause you to hold grudges. Your understanding of human nature runs the risk of being purely intellectual. Feh!

The new moon in your sign on February 9 favors innovation, exploration of the unknown, and experimentation. With Saturn in retrograde from February 18 until July 8, consider reexamining any outmoded ways of thinking and dealing with unfinished business—you can do so much more than you thought possible. The love planet Venus is in your sign until February 25th, so expect the thrills of freedom and independence. You might not find your beshert in time for Valentine’s Day, but some trial and error may be enough to awaken those dormant romantic impulses.

Famous Aquarius Jews: Gertrude Stein, Martin Buber, Michael Bloomberg, Neil Diamond, Paul Newman, Seth Green, Louis Zukofsky, Carole King, Philip Glass, Felix Mendelssohn, Jack Benny, Stella Adler, Paul Auster, Jonathan Lethem, Art Spiegelman, Betty Friedan, Darren Aronofsky, Judy Blume, Jennifer Jason Leigh, Jerry Springer, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Pauly Shore, Regina Spektor, Zosia Mamet

PISCES (FEBRUARY 21-MARCH 20): Things may get worse before they get better—Aider es kumt di nechomeh, ken oisgaien di neshomeh. Mars and Mercury move into your sign in February, making compassion and dreaming the order of the day. Pisces can be gluttons for punishment, but if you stand up for yourself without equivocating, the people you need most will rush to your side in solidarity.

ARIES (MARCH 21-APRIL 20): It seems like the universe is conspiring to put all of your plans on the back burner. During February your ruling planet Mars will be transiting through Pisces, the planet of compassion and empathy, which doesn’t exactly jive well with your typical warrior stance. However, ven men darf hoben moiach, helft nit kain koiach—when brains are needed, brawn won’t help.

TAURUS (APRIL 21-MAY 20): You may be feeling cautious in romantic pursuits for fear of rejection, making your prospects appear stalled and limited. But reality is more of a give-and-take than you realized. Before you can experience mekheye, you’ll need do some serious assessment about what you really want out of love.

GEMINI (MAY 21-JUNE 20): While you’ve been trying to focus on your career, mental Mercury’s move into Pisces on February 5 ignites your fantasies and dreams. Practicality may seem boring—if not hazardous—but rather than voglen (wander around aimlessly), be honest with yourself and others about what’s going on in that head of yours.

CANCER (JUNE 21-JULY 20): Cosmic energies are insisting that you broaden your horizons. So ease up and let yourself go—your sanctimonious tendencies often push others away. An epiphanic moment may be in store for you, transforming the way you view your place in the universe.  

LEO (JULY 21-AUGUST 20): Although it seems like everything is working against you right now, this trial by fire could be a blessing in disguise. While domestic matters may take center stage, you’ll be strengthened by the realization that you’re a light that won’t go out. You’re the richtiker chaifetz (the real McCoy), you feisty felines—just hang in there and the method to this madness will eventually reveal itself.

VIRGO (AUGUST 21-SEPTEMBER 20): As charming as you can be, you’re often guilty of haken a chainik (talking for the sake of talking). The only way to get close to people is to interact with mutual regard and empathy. Try listening for a change and the rest will follow.

LIBRA (SEPTEMBER 21-OCTOBER 20): A wise man once said, “the world is a tragedy to those who feel, but a comedy to those who think.” Since Libra is the sign of balance, you would do well to find a way to mediate between thinking and feeling. After all, heaven and hell can both be had in this world—ganaiden un gehenem ken men baideh hoben oif der velt.

SCORPIO (OCTOBER 21-NOVEMBER 20): You’ve been oysgemutshet (worked to death, tired out) for far too long. Don’t hate the player, hate the game: examine the source of your frustration. The truth has many faces—der emess hot a sach ponimer—and admitting that the past just isn’t through with you will help you make the changes you need for a brighter future.

SAGITTARIUS (NOVEMBER 21–DECEMBER 20): Freud interpreted the dual nature of Sagittarius as the ego’s way of navigating the warring id and superego. For fiery Sagittarians, it is often oder gor oder gornit (all or nothing). Rather than force something that just wasn’t meant to be, try to rise above the shtuss and learn to love the dueling sides of yourself.

CAPRICORN (DECEMBER 21–JANUARY 20): With your ruling planet Saturn in retrograde from February 18 to July 8 and planets moving out of your sign, you may feel a particular sense of loss and confusion. For now, focus on your health—mental, spiritual, physical—rather than gesunte tzores. Gather your strength, for soon you’ll regain equilibrium.

What’s Your Sign?
Capricorn, the Cardinal Earth Sign
Sagittarius, the Adventurous Archer
Stinging Scorpio
Lovely, Lawful Libra
Virgo, the Anxious Maiden
Leo, King of the Jungle

(Art by Margarita Korol)

***

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The post Jewcy Horoscopes: Aquarius, Sign of Contradictions (Jan. 21—Feb. 20) appeared first on Jewcy.

Capricorn (Dec. 21–Jan 20): Krich nit tsu hoich, vestu nit darfen falen: Don’t climb too high and you won’t have to fall.


Hebrews named Capricorn “the slain kid,” which refers to the blood of the lamb sacrificed during the Passover story, saving firstborns from slaughter. Capricorn was also known as Azazel, the scapegoat from Leviticus.



Capricorn, a cardinal earth sign, shows a great deal of initiative: you want to control your environment rather than have it control you. Although you are earth-bound, you are more concerned with your own state of mind—which is largely ambitious, but also idealistic to the point of neurotic—than with the outside world.  

While Capricornis generally thought of to be ruled by the goat, you are actually ruled by a goat-fish (a goat with a fish tail!). Although your goat side is always climbing toward the top of the mountain, you also take refuge in the waters of consciousness (this is associated with the Greek god Pan, who took refuge in a river by turning his lower half into a fish). Finding a balance between caution and passion allows you to flip the script on those who have you pinned one way or the other.  If you lean toward the goat-side, try to handle others—and yourself!—with kid gloves. 



There are three different levels of Capricorn:  practical, earthly and sensual, and confused by depth of desires—why you may often fail to express your true feelings, concealing them under your practicality and work ethic. Striving to be industrious and persevering, calm and diligent and determined, your concern with status makes you almost puritanical in your discipline. Largely conservative, you are the consummate professional—shveyr arbiter (hard worker)—not exposing your feelings, and patiently waiting for the results of your hard work and ambitions. 



The New Moon in your sign on January 11 gives an opportunity to put something in motion—perhaps one of your long-awaited ambitions will come to fruition if you put your nose to the grindstone. Mercury also shifts into your sign on December 31, where it will stay until January 18. You can really get into your pragmatic thinking and express your true self. With Mars in Aquarius starting December 25, take more initiative in a leadership role. Venus in Sagittarius, meanwhile, gives you a chance to really take a look at your love life, giving you more freedom to solidify your true self and what you want out of love.  


Famous Capricorn Jews: J.D. Salinger, Jason Segel, Bebe Neuwirth, Sandy Koufax, Hank Greenberg, Simon Wiesenthal, Howard Stern, Shari Lewis, Andy Kaufman, Helena Rubenstein, Heidi Fleiss, Phil Spector, Harry Shearer, Soupy Sales, Diane Von Furstenberg, Vidal Sassoon, Laura Schlessinger, Susan Sontag, Stan Lee, Isaac Asimov (unknown, but celebrated on Jan.2)



AQUARIUS (JANUARY 21-FEBRUARY 20): You may be dreaming of a better reality, but try to relax and let the fates do their thing. Vos vet zein, vet zein: what will be, will be! While you Aquarians tend to be emotionally detached, you can harness these cosmic energies to give yourself over to something greater than yourself.  

PISCES (FEBRUARY 21-MARCH 20): You’ve been selling yourself short for far too long, and your neshama may be a bit worse for wear. Forces are at work to get you the recognition you deserve, and perhaps a much-needed boost in your finances. Sweet Pisces often want to help others—but before you do that, you must help yourself. 
 
ARIES (MARCH 21-APRIL 20): With your ruling planet Mars in innovative and philanthropic Aquarius, you may find yourself spending time with new people and in situations that call for your special brand of bravado. If you can look at your life from the outside, you’ll see that you can deal with your ongoing issues while giving attention to the rest of the world.

TAURUS (APRIL 21- MAY 20): Life keeps teaching you the lesson that time can alter everything: di tseit ken alts ibermachen. As much as you’ve been burning both ends of the candle for what seems like ages, you must continue to assert yourself. Doing what’s right for you, rather than what others think is the right thing for you, gives you the courage of your convictions.

GEMINI (MAY 21- JUNE 20): Kolboynik (rascally know-it-all) Geminis have a knack for finding convenient excuses and explanations for everything. With your ruling planet moving into Capricorn around January 8, you may become more focused on money matters, favoring independence and practicality over flights of fancy.

CANCER (JUNE 21-JULY 20): With the full moon in your sign on December 28, you will be more inclined to pay attention to details that may have previously gone unnoticed. Because this particular full moon has some stressful energies attached to it, you may feel even more like secluding yourself in your shell. If you can find a way to make your home cozy while getting yourself out into the world, you may be in for a surprise or two.

LEO (JULY 21-AUGUST 20): Ven nit di shein, volt kain shoten nit geven: If not for the light, there would be no shadow. Leos have the potential to light up a room with your good vibes, and the upcoming full moon energy is perfect for empathizing with others. Understanding other people and what they’re all about can help you relate to yourself with more clarity of purpose.

VIRGO (AUGUST 21-SEPTEMBER 20): Be good to yourselves this month, dear Virgos. You may hold dear to your balobotishe (respectable, well-mannered) reputation, but embracing your creativity and individuality does not mean letting go of your cred. Your ruling planet Venus will be in Sagittarius for the first part of the new year, giving you the freedom to explore what makes you truly healthy, wealthy and wise.

LIBRA (SEPTEMBER 21-OCTOBER 20): Libras sometimes get a bad rap for being a Jack-of-all trades, master of none (Fil meloches, vainik broches). This month, you may be feeling insecure about your indecision, and tendency to flit from one interest to another. Deep feelings may be heading your way, and holding on to a something stable may help you to decide what is most important to you. 


SCORPIO (OCTOBER 21-NOVEMBER 20): To you secretive Scorpios, information is power, and power is maintained by keeping that information to yourself. Who do you think you’re fooling? Listening to your heart will give you a sense of what you really want out of life, love and career.  You can be true to yourself without giving the rest of us shpilkes. 


SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 21–Dec. 20): If you feel your confidence has been given a once over from all of the planets traveling through your sign in the past month, keep in mind that you fire signs have a lot your corner to ensure you remain true to your echt (authentic) self. You’ve got a lot of room to maneuver, and if anyone gives you a hard time for your freedom-urges, they probably weren’t worth having around to begin with.

What’s Your Sign?
Sagittarius, the Adventurous Archer (Nov. 21 – Dec. 20)
Stinging Scorpio (October 21-November 20)
Lovely, Lawful Libra (September 21-October 20)
Virgo, the Anxious Maiden (August 21-September 20)
Leo, King of the Jungle (July 21 – August 20)

(Art by Margarita Korol)

The post Jewcy Horoscopes: Capricorn, the Cardinal Earth Sign (Dec. 21–Jan 20) appeared first on Jewcy.

Sagittarius (Nov. 21-Dec. 20): Oif itlechen terets ken men gefinen a nei’eh kasheh: To every answer you can find a new question.

The archer always hits his mark. Sagittarius was the tribal symbol of Ephraim and Manasseh. The sign was also associated with Joash, king of Israel, shooting arrows out of the window eastward at the command of the dying Elisha.

Your astrological symbol is the Centaur, half-man and half-horse, exemplifying humanity’s dual nature. The archetypal explorer, Sagittarius is the sign of the bachelor: you are both a seducer and an upholder of wisdom and justice. Your mutable nature highlights the tension between the civilized human and the instinctive animal. Sagitarrians are often said to be tactless. More likely, however, like the archer, you know exactly what to target when you are angered—you have the ability to sense others’ weak spots

You see the world for what it is and want to explore it to the farthest ends. Most comfortable when you are doing things on your own, you have the courage of your convictions by your side and are adept at explaining anything with frankness and candor. Very analytical and patient, you make an excellent teacher.

The high social energy of the full moon lunar eclipse in Gemini, November 28 lights up your need to share your philosophies, while the new moon in Capricorn on December 13 encourages you to apply them to your own life. These energies are great for gaining perspective on the past. Broaden your horizons, and actualize the changes you’ve resolved to put in action. Az me zucht, gefint men: If you seek, you will find.

Famous Sagittarius Jews: Isaac Bashevis Singer, Ben Stiller, Bette Midler, Woody Allen, Eugene Levy, Gary Shandling, Harpo Marx, Howard Zinn, Noam Chomsky, Baruch Spinoza, Sammy Davis, Jr., Rahm Emanuel, Mose “The Rabbi of Swat” Solomon, Eli Wallach, Harold Gould, Jon Stewart, Steven Spielberg, Jakob Dylan, Mandy Patinkin, Howie Mandel, Paul Celan, Randy Newman, Ira Gershwin, Nostradamus (either Dec 14 or 21).

CAPRICORN (DECEMBER 21-JANUARY 20): Action-hero Mars will be in your sign from November 16 to December 25, encouraging you to gantseh k’nocker (put it all on the table). While these energies direct you toward things to come, keep an eye on the past: a historical artifact or philosophy may be the key to your future.

AQUARIUS (JANUARY 21-FEBRUARY 20): With your ruling sign Uranus turning direct on December 13, you have the opportunity to actualize the psychological exploration you’ve been doing since the summer. With the big pay off for all of your intuitive inner-changes around the corner, don’t be afraid to rock the boat!

PISCES (FEBRUARY 21-MARCH 20): Life seems to have been putting you through one trial after another, but how you come out of the wringer is up to you. Your ruling planet Neptune is finally moving direct, which should help you apply the lessons you’ve learned. Try not to feel farfaln (hopeless)—but remember: if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.

ARIES (MARCH 21-APRIL 20): Your ruling planet Mars will be in earthy, practical Capricorn until the end of December. This gives you a chance to focus on your career and other worldly tasks, you gantseh makher (big shot). However, something may still be stuck in your craw. Before you get all broygis (pissed off), consider any minor adjustments you’ve been ignoring—maybe you need to take a page from Dr. Ruth and pay more attention to your love life.

TAURUS (APRIL 21- MAY 20): Your ruling planet Sweet Venus is in the intense sign Scorpio. You eingeshparht bulls may be fools for love, but staying grounded can help you combat the intensity. Keeping busy and listening to your heart is the first step to sharing it with someone else.

GEMINI (MAY 21- JUNE 20): Even if it’s true that Az men hot nit tsu entfern, muz men farshveign—If one has nothing to say, it’s best to shut up—you Geminis resent being told to bite your tongue. The Mercury retrograde was rough on you, but now that your ruling planet will be moving direct for the rest of 2012, your communications will ease. Use your powers of persuasion and your rich imagination more subtly: it’ll give you an air of mystery.

CANCER (JUNE 21-JULY 20): The Lunar eclipse on November 28th in social butterfly sign Gemini gives you cause to criticize your fun-loving astrological neighbors, priding yourself on the fact that you don’t suffer fools gladly. But it might do you some good to take a look in the mirror before throwing any more stones. Before you start schvitzing, take a chill pill and focus that constructive criticism inward.

LEO (JULY 21-AUGUST 20): What gives light must also endure burning, and your bright Leo sun has burned you more than you’d like to admit. It may seem like you’ve been fighting a losing battle, but maintain some balance, you volatile beasts! The total eclipse of the heart on November 28 will give you a much needed boost.

VIRGO (AUGUST 21-SEPTEMBER 20): With your ruling planet Mercury mercifully direct for the remainder of 2012, channel your energy into a more creative direction. Profound mood changes may coincide with the Full Moon eclipse in Gemini. Ignore the impulse to give into the plotka-macher sitting on your left shoulder. Instead, let the socially astute maiden on your right guide you.

LIBRA (SEPTEMBER 21-OCTOBER 20): You may be swamped with responsibilities, misinformation, and money problems: oy gevalt! It may be difficult, since you Libras tend to be pisk malukheh—all talk and no action—but try to solve these problems on the New Moon on December 13. If you commit to finding a solution, it should pay off by the end of the year.

SCORPIO (OCTOBER 21-NOVEMBER 20): A ligner darf hoben a guten zechron: A liar should have a good memory. You not only play your cards close to your chest, you also play for keeps. With Lovely Venus is in your sign until December 15, you may experience an intense yearning for what’s far away. Look beneath the surface of things to determine what you really want.

What’s Your Sign?
Stinging Scorpio (October 21-November 20)
Lovely, Lawful Libra (September 21-October 20)
Virgo, the Anxious Maiden (August 21-September 20)
Leo, King of the Jungle (July 21 – August 20)

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LIBRA (SEPTEMBER 21-OCTOBER 20): Di gantse velt shteyt oyf der shpits tsung: All the world is on the tip of the tongue.

You often find yourself wavering between pleasure and freedom, between yourself and others, believing you have to choose one over the other. But you can have it all, Lovely Libra! You are naturally idealistic and social, but there’s no need to go between the extremes. Slow your role, and you’ll find the balance you need to be satisfied.

Inspired by Venus, you lean toward idealism. Some say you are living in a fool’s paradise. While you don’t care what other people think and have a tendency to say controversial things, you are primarily devoted to maintaining order. People like you and want to be around you, even if you are the king of flakes—you’re so likable, easygoing, and charming that all is forgiven! Although civilized and full of wit, you love intrigue: you are self-indulgent and enjoy gossip and social scandal.

Ruled by the scales, Libra is the only inanimate sign of the zodiac. Your careful metallic measurements indicate that you often have to be cruel to be just. After all, you are the sign of law and justice. Although you are diplomatic and peaceable, on the flip side you are also indecisive, changeable, and do not take criticism very well, preferring to ignore the dark sides of yourself and others. Libras rule the kidneys, lower back and ovaries—Libras can often bring their physical bodies into equilibrium through sheer intuition.

The unstable full moon in Aries on September 30 could push you in any direction—the unpredictable nature of this moon could bring up some painful realizations. This could be a difficult time for you to avoid touchy subjects, so face them head on! Vos barist du? (What are you fooling around for?) The past three years have been particularly trying for you, but taskmaster Saturn will leave your sign in early October.

Famous Libra Jews: Leonard Cohen, Ethan Coen, Arthur Miller, Donna Karan, Fran Drescher, Lenny Bruce, Sasha Baron Cohen, Fyvush Finkel, Isaac Mizrahi, David Ben-Gurion, Elie Wiesel, Paul Simon, Alicia Silverstone, Mark Rothko, Jesse Eisenberg, Jon Favreau, Walter Matthau, Jerry Orbach (half-Jewish).

SCORPIO (OCTOBER 21-NOVEMBER 20): Every heart has secrets—Yedeh harts hot soides—but secrets have a way of getting out. The new moon in your sign on October 15 gives you a chance to start to accept that you don’t have a monopoly on control and power. It’s too easy for you to deny that any of this has a thing to do with you. Just remember: don’t do the crime if you can’t do the time.

SAGITTARIUS (NOVEMBER 21-DECEMBER 20): Your ruling planet Jupiter goes retrograde on October 4 until January 30, 2013. This is a good time to confront yourself head on—are you doing what you want to be doing or are you doing it for others? It might also be time to restore a relationship, or just reach out and touch someone!

CAPRICORN (DECEMBER 21-JANUARY 20): It’s great that you are striving for the highest peak on the mountain of life, but you may find yourself between a rock and a hard place if you don’t look where you’re going. Azoy vert dos kichel tzekrochen: That’s how the cookie crumbles! Don’t spend too much time worrying, but try your best not to ignore the lesson of looking before you leap.

AQUARIUS (JANUARY 21-FEBRUARY 20): You don’t need a weatherman to tell you which way the wind is blowing. It’s difficult for you to admit to yourself, but you are finally coming to terms with things that other people learned years ago. Don’t punish yourself (or that special someone) because you aren’t accustomed to emotional turmoil—embrace the drama. It’s in an essential part of life!

PISCES (FEBRUARY 21-MARCH 20): Your tendency to absorb the troubles and egos of those around you often causes you tsuris. What you love and what you hate may be one and the same, sweet Pisces. Your fish may swim in two opposite directions, but accepting this will allow you to give up some of your martyr complex.

ARIES (MARCH 21-APRIL 20): The energies of the new year will remain with you while you determine your next course of action. Aries are the pioneers of the Zodiac, concerned with the present moment. The full moon in your sign on September 30 encourages you to pay attention to consequences—you may be a rebel but it’s always better to have a cause.

TAURUS (APRIL 21- MAY 20): A new chapter in your life is opening—‘should I stay or should I go’ has been your mantra lately. One thing you must realize is that it doesn’t matter where you are, it’s really about grounding yourself and growing. You can lend yourself to others without giving up a thing.

GEMINI (MAY 21- JUNE 20): Your humor and natural curiosity is infectious, you crazy kochleffel (one who stirs up trouble; lit., a cooking ladle). But you’d be wise to check yourself before you wreck yourself: stop worrying about what others are up to and focus on your own journey of self-discovery.

CANCER (JUNE 21-JULY 20): Although Cancers err on the side of being apikoros (an unbeliever, a skeptic), even you have to recognize the fated nature of the maxim “good things come to those who wait.” You’ve been waiting long enough, haven’t you? Grab hold of it with both hands: its yours.

LEO (JULY 21-AUGUST 20): Out of sight, out of mind–Vayt fun di oygn, vayt fun hartsn—has never really been your thing. The more you try to ignore something, the harder it comes back at you. Rather than deny the fire radiating within you, embrace it and the creativity it inspires in you and others.

VIRGO (AUGUST 21-SEPTEMBER 20): Living for others has never been your strong suit. The sooner you embrace this rather than giving yourself a hard time, the better you will feel. You Virgos don’t do anything half way, and that includes focusing more on your own needs. Venus moving into Virgo until from October 2nd until the 28th confirms that it might do you some good to be a little selfish.

What’s Your Sign?
Virgo, the Anxious Maiden (August 21-September 20)
Leo, King of the Jungle (July 21 – August 20)
Introducing Jewcy Horoscopes: Cancer (June 21-July 20)

(Art by Margarita Korol)

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VIRGO (AUGUST 21-SEPTEMBER 20): An einredenish iz erger vi a krenk: An imaginary illness is worse than a real one.

Practical, dependable, modest, graceful and extremely reserved, Virgo is characterized by the Virgin Maiden, as well as the bird (like all mutable signs, Virgo is “double-bodied”—adaptable and dualistic). As such, your powers of eloquence, composure, precision and tact are to be lauded. However, you are often overly-critical and can strain yourself with your vigilance and inflexiblity—you work hard so that your calm exterior never betrays your anxious interior, and this disconnect can lead to frayed nerves.

Virgos are ruled by the belly and intestines (Kishka). You operate via gut reaction rather than psychic intuition. You thrive when you are solving problems, creating order out of chaos, and otherwise exercising your brain muscles. Your nervousness, however, when unchecked, can lead to hypochondria and extreme anxiety. Obsessed with hygiene and organization, you often bottle up for feelings—feelings are not, after all, very clean and orderly.

With the New Moon in your sign on September 16 (Rosh Hashanah), and a Full (Blue) Moon in Aries on the 30th (Sukkot), and Yom Kippur in between, you may find particular significance in the tashlich ceremony—how very Virgo to systematically cast off your sins to make a clean slate for the New Year!

Famous Virgo Jews: Peter Falk, Leonard Bernstein, Adam Sandler, Alan Dershowitz, Dr. Drew, Gene Simmons, Dorothy Parker (half-Jewish), Sid Caesar, Pink (half-Jewish), Stephen Fry (half-Jewish), Max Greenfield, Lewis Black, Gwyneth Paltrow (half-Jewish)

LIBRA (SEPTEMBER 21-OCTOBER 20): It’s healthy to question whether you are getting what you want out of life, but dangerous to assume that the path not taken was the right one. Let life unfold naturally—you’ve been warned!

SCORPIO (OCTOBER 21-NOVEMBER 20): 
Your ruling planet Pluto turns direct on September 18, allowing your subconscious to take a break. Stop ignoring your deepest desires and focusing only on getting through the day, and you’ll gain control of your life (and probably prevent some gray hairs).

SAGITTARIUS (NOVEMBER 21-DECEMBER 20): Resentment can build up, preventing you from seeing things for what they are. The New Year will usher in good tidings, allowing you to see with clarity that the decisions you make in life are what shapes it—and you.

CAPRICORN (DECEMBER 21-JANUARY 20): Capricorns are the Vulcans of the Zodiac. It’s not that you don’t have feelings, but you play your cards too close to your chest, guarding yourself against anything impractical. You’ve got so much going on inside of you that it would be a crime not to express yourself! New Year, New You!

AQUARIUS (JANUARY 21-FEBRUARY 20): Pay extra attention this Yom Kippur—your innate indifference can blind you to your own foibles. Once you open up to the possibility that some of this may be your doing, you’ll be more conscious of how to fix it.

PISCES (FEBRUARY 21-MARCH 20): You adorable luftmensh, you! The retrograde triple threat in the slow moving planets makes your psychic abilities so keen that it may be painful. Use this time to sift through these psychic energies, and you’ll begin to reap what you’ve sown throughout the year.

ARIES (MARCH 21-APRIL 20): Rosh Hashanah literally means “the head of the year”—and Aries heads the zodiac in Western astrology. Brandish your shofar and hark the herald! You may be the bold brazen ram, but think about relinquishing some of your control. There’s plenty of time to bemoan a bad fortune once it arrives.

TAURUS (APRIL 21- MAY 20): Surround yourself with people you trust and be direct with what you need from others. They’ll be more willing to help if you know what you want and aren’t afraid to ask for it. True love will come when the time is right. Until it does, remember this: you better work!

GEMINI (MAY 21- JUNE 20): Although Mental Mercury makes you a bit of a macher, you’d better give up on your scheme to harness time. That’s never going to happen. Your versatility and inquisitive nature make you a perfect candidate for embracing the energies of the universe and working with them, not against them.

CANCER (JUNE 21-JULY 20): Sages have said it is unwise to speculate on the unknowable, and for many Cancers this includes other people. You ought to exercise your empathy muscles and cast your sins of dogmatic prejudice into the river of new beginnings—you’ll be surprised by how much others want to include you in their lives.

LEO (JULY 21-AUGUST 20): For this you went to college? Although you may feel you are about to burst from the fear that you’ll never move beyond your current circumstances, it’s time to put up or shut up—tokhis oyfn tish. Big changes this month beseech you to keep your eyes on the prize, you Lucky Leo.

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