Shia’s Not So Shy About the Liquor

Shia LaBeouf wants equal time. How else do you explain his latest in a series of arrests, warrants, and court dates each with their own, unique alcohol-related story? You see, when Shia recently decided to get drunk, flip his ride like a turtle on its back, then stagger out of his truck in a boozy haze proclaiming, “You mean we’re not filming a scene for Transformers 2?” he made his intentions clear. Shia LaBeouf wants the same amount of attention as inebriated gals like Nicole, Britney, and Lindsay; and he’s willing to do anything to get it. Sure, his two Vanity Fair covers were nice, but getting arrested after being drunk and obnoxious in a Walgreen’s earned Shia a chat with David Letterman. Starring in two of the summer’s biggest blockbusters undoubtedly garnered LaBeouf accolades, but an arrest for smoking, followed by a forgotten court date, earned him international magazine covers. You can hire the best publicist in town but without a scandal, you’re just another actor trying to get some attention. And that's the rub: you don’t actually need a job or a skill to be revered by the masses. Get some celebrity friends, couple that with a drug or alcohol problem, and you’re one arrest away from hosting your own reality show. You may even win an Emmy! Thing is, there's a long list of those who drew the short end of the Hollywood Scandal stick. For every Hugh Grant–whose career benefited from his game of “Don’t Tell My Girlfriend” with a Hollywood Boulevard hooker–there are countless Rob Lowe’s, whose scandal actually costs them something, namely a job. So Shia, you may want to adopt another plan of attack. If you just can’t wait for a cab and don’t want to shell out the money for a driver, how about driving yourself over to a local AA meeting? Sure, it won’t be so anonymous, “Hi my name is Shia….”, but at least you’ll get some attention. And isn’t that what you’re really after? If not, I’ve got two words for you: Russell Crowe.