About Marty Beckerman
Why Christmas Kicks Hanukkah’s Ass
"I’m a Jew, a lonely Jew-I’d be merry but I’m Hebrew-on Chrissssssssstmasssssssss…" -Kyle Broflovski, South Park This won’t make me popular in some neurotic circles, but my Hebrew name means "The Bringer of Light" so I am going … Read More
Atonement for Assholes
Organized religion is full of contradictions-for example, could God create a boulder so heavy that He cannot lift it, and then create a heavier boulder that would outweigh the combined bloat of Michael Moore and Rush Limbaugh?-and here is one … Read More
McCainiac No More: Why This Maverick is Voting Obama
Perhaps it was a circus act for the gullible and schmaltz-inclined, but the Sen. John McCain of 2000 combined the best characteristics of Superman (a hero who defended Truth, Justice and the American Way), Batman (a zillionaire with a dark … Read More
Not Helping: Golden Monkey Hindu Love Idols for Obama
Considering that religion and ethnicity are such sensitive issues in this election year, it might not help Obama to have the vocal support of an Indian politician named Brij Mohan Bhama, who will hold an eleven-day prayer for Obama’s victory … Read More
Viral Video of the Day: Willie Nelson and Snoop Dogg Unite the Races with ‘Medicine’
Not many people enjoy both country music and gangsta rap. The average country fan doesn't want to listen to black people complain about the ghetto, and the average rap fan doesn't want to hear some cracker-ass cracker talk about his … Read More
Live Blogging the First Day of Gay Marriage in California
Monday, June 16, 5:01 p.m.: Robin Tyler and Diane Olsen, who won their California Supreme Court case to get married, are the first gay couple wed at the Beverly Hills Courthouse. The mayor of San Francisco officiates at the wedding … Read More
Barack Obama Eased My White Guilt For White Flight
As a straight white guy with a propensity for boozing, I feel qualified to observe that not only is everyone (at least) a little bit gay; everyone is (more than) a little bit racist. It doesn’t matter if you’re white, … Read More
The Only Rapping Jewish Faith Healer in the Presidential Race
Te’DeVan “Rocketman” Kurzweil is the quintessential Jewish New Yorker bohemian weirdo. A six-foot-seven-inch faith healer, freestyle rapper and former nude comedian, Te’DeVan is a local legend who makes his living in tips from those whom he cures and entertains. (I … Read More
