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The Knish Comeback

Just when you thought that Thanksgivingukkah couldn’t get any more exciting, we drop a knish bomb on you. Gabila’s Knishes have been out of knishes for six weeks due to a factory fire, but the perfect treats will be back in time for the American and Jewish holiday extravaganza, Haaretz reports in an article with the greatest, most desperate quotes ever.

“For the last month I haven’t had any knishes — my heart is broken,” said Carol Anfuso, a native New Yorker who has been without a knish to nosh since the BJ’s Wholesale store near her Atlanta home suddenly stopped stocking them.

The people want their knishes—and we can’t really blame them. Those doughy, potato-filled dumplings are the answer to all of life’s toughest questions. Hungry? Have a knish. Full? Have a knish. Happy? Have a knish. Sad? Have three knishes. With no knishes to turn to, the people started phoning.

“Our customers … are calling us saying they are literally searching supermarkets and stores and they’re all asking when we’ll be back,” Stacey Ziskin Gabay, one of the owners of the 92-year-old Gabila’s Knishes, which sells about 15 million knishes a year.

Thank goodness they’ll be back soon—15 million more knishes in our collective bellies.

(Photo by Elzbieta Sekowska/Shutterstock)

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