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Announced: 2007 Darwin Awards Winners!!!

An alcoholic who died after giving himself a sherry enema has won the 2007 Darwin Award. The Darwin Awards commemorate those who improve the gene pool by accidentally removing themselves from it.

Runners-up include:

Eighth Place: In Detroit, a 41-year-old man got stuck and drowned in two feet of water after squeezing head first through an 18-inch-wide sewer grate while trying to retrieve his car keys.

Seventh Place: A 49-year-old San Francisco stockbroker — who often bragged he was 'totally-zoned when he ran' — accidentally jogged off a 100-foot high cliff on his daily workout. Sixth Place: While at the beach, Daniel Jones, 21, dug an 8-foot hole for protection from the wind and had been sitting in a beach chair at the bottom when it collapsed, burying him beneath 5 feet of sand. People on the beach used their hands and shovels trying to get him out but could not reach him. It took rescue workers using heavy equipment almost an hour to free him. Jones was pronounced dead at a local hospital. Fifth Place: Santiago Alvarado, 24, was killed as he fell through the ceiling of a bicycle shop he was burglarizing. Death was caused when the long flashlight he had placed in his mouth to keep his hands free rammed into the base of his skull as he hit the floor.

For more good fun, check out darwinawards.com

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