The Catholic Girl Should Have Had a Jewish Mother
Girl: He was wearing a t-shirt that said 'My Jewish Mother Gave Me Two Options: Law school or Medical school.' Guy: I like that. I should make a shirt for my friend that says 'My Irish Catholic Mother Gave Me Two Options: Marry the Asshole Who Knocked Me Up and Live a Life of Alcoholic Domestic Violence or Join the Sisters of Saint Ignatius.' 'Cause clearly she chose neither. Girl: What do you mean? Guy: She said, 'To hell with this religious bullshit,' had an abortion, got her MBA, and is now a Junior VP at a Midtown PR firm. Girl: Are you trying to say that religion is bullshit? Guy, patting girl on head: No, sweetie. You go find yourself that guy wearing the Jewish mother t-shirt and you'll be fine.