Apart from the Superbowl's Cirque du Soleil nightmare of a pre-show; the game's slippery start, middle, and end; and the team I was rooting for suffering an embarrassing loss, this year's $2.5 Million 30-second commercial spots weren't too shabby.
Translation: The game blew so I'm going to choose to dwell on the night's questionably superior ads.
The first quarter started out with the Crash The Superbowl competition. Doritos aired two of their five finalists' 30-second videos and the competition's winner Dale Backus paled in comparison to his runner-up, the chubby check-out girl.
The Snickers spot featuring two butch mechanics who accidentally suck face to a Snickers bar and then rip off their chest hair to be "manly" was one of the night's more understated commercials. The obnoxious Chevy spot with a bunch of dudes in their underwear bumping and grinding to a Chevy truck full of fly chicks while listening to Nelly's Hot in Here would be its antithesis. Then again, the commercial was the brainchild of a 19-year-old college student.
Other highlights included Sprint's "Connectile Dysfunction" because we've all been in the awkward position of not being able to get our wireless networks up; Bud Light's "Rock, Paper, Scissors" because two grown men playing rock, paper, scissors just translates to funny, especially when an actual rock is involved; CareerBuilder.Com's "Do More Than Just Surive The Work Week" humor was not lost on me, but made me depressed that the advent of the work week was less than twelve hours away.
Comedian Thomas Ian Black (nee Schwartz) (of VH1's "Best Week Ever" fame) and cohorts Tracy Morgan and Jim Gaffigan in the improv-based "Mist Takes" for Sierra Mist were quasi-funny, specifically the commerical with Black and Gaffigan as a man with a beard combover, but Morgan needs to stay buried under his Thursday night rock indefinitely. Is it the clean-shaven face that gives Morgan some heightened sense of comedic talent these days or is my "SNL" memory betraying me? I thought this guy used to be a little funny.
Coca-Cola celebrated Black History Month with a tribute to all the critical moments in U.S. Black History, especially the Superbowl, but surprisingly opted against a Biden quote. GoDaddy.Com had two of this year's ads rejected from the Superbowl for racy content but the third one, which featured "Real World: Las Vegas" resident floozy Trishelle, managed to fly under the radar. And while on the subject of D-list celebs, K-Fed/Fed-Ex did a mean impression of a fast-food employee rapping his workday away for Nationwide. I predict a Big Mac in this man's future.
So what ever happened to the guy rumored to be proposing to his girlfriend during the Superbowl for $2.5 Million? Cold feet or lack of funds?
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