Jewcy Zeitgeist: Palin the Poet, Rivers Disses Leno, and Bye Bye Undie Run

Here are today’s top stories in no particular order:

• Good news from the Taliban: apparently, the new "rule book" is requesting fewer suicide attacks, specifically those aimed at civilians.

• Two Georgia officers are under investigation for reportedly running criminal background checks on President Obama. Their superior has said their behavior "will not be tolerated."

• UCLA has decided to ban its unofficial, thrice-yearly tradition called the "Undie Run," citing safety concerns. And to think, my school had a hard enough time calling an award ceremony the "UNDY’s." Oh, Jesuits.

• A little bit of old news, but seriously, have you heard Sarah Palin’s farewell speech to the state of Alaska? Here it is, word for word. It’s even better when William Shatner does it poetry-slam style.

• The chair of the Republican Senate Conference has said that he endorses Sonya Sotomayor for the U.S. Supreme Court.

• Joan Rivers isn’t playing nice with Jay Leno. She called his show a sleep aid. Personally, I could say the same of his replacement. With the obvious exception of the poetry slam bit from Monday night. [Editor’s note: I will always have residual "Simpsons" related love for Conan.]