Like Biting Into Frank Bruni’s Eggy Lawn & Spewing Chodorow Chunks

New York Times Restaurant critic Frank Bruni may be on Chodorow's "Most Wanted" list (ironic, when you think about it) and subsequently banned from all 29 of his establishments for poor restaurant reviews, but that hasn't stopped Bruni from serving up more deliciously subversive takes on Chodorow venues, namely The Hotel Gansevoort's unappealing brunch offerings.

Bruni recently went undercover in NYC hotels to unearth all that's grimy and sublime in the realm of food.

Beware: These reviews aren't of the high-end luxury living magazine material. Oh, wait. Who are we kidding? This is The New York Times! There's nothing too counter-culture here.

Gridskipper had a suggestion to make Bruni's hotel jaunt a bit juicier. That is, than last week's Village Voice interview on steaks.

By far though, the most fun of the Bruni report, (other than this stunningly helpful graphic) is a new sport we call, "Bruni For the Straight Guy" wherein one seeks out the gayest double entendre from the tastemaker's repertoire.

Option A:

But the stranger in my room at the London NYC hotel on a recent night had my full attention, because he was doing something I wasn't at all accustomed to. He was crawling across the floor and under the coffee table.

Option B:

The food will arrive at the most inopportune moment, e.g., when you've just decided to try on the odd leopard-print robe hanging in the bathroom at the Muse Hotel in Midtown.

We're going to go with Option A which seems lifted straight out of a Craigslist Casual Encounters post, albeit a delicious well-written well-poached one.

I'd opt for Option B. It's got that bold element of reality wrapped up in fiction with a twist of the absurd. Tart, but well worth the intake.