Today’s Jewcy

The Jewcer (Happy New Year!):

Alternadad: Neal Pollack’s opening salvo as a hipster father is now up. “My goals with this column aren’t really political. There are other people who understand the “Mommy Wars” much better than I do, and the ethics of nanny hiring are far away from my reality—we’re lucky if we can afford a sitter two Saturday nights a month.” [Jewcy: Features]

99 Problems, and Beirut Ain’t One: Editor-in-chief Tahl Raz and Features editor Izzy Grinspan discuss the fine art of beer pong, a.k.a. “Beirut.” (What a problematic name for a drinking sport in a Jewish magazine.) “All I'm saying is that, just as you assume all Williamsburg-living Brown-educated Jews hate Beirut, one normally assumes that i-banker guys don't read Wendy Wasserstein (and don't marry their best friends.) I think it's pretty awesome that these guys appear to have every trapping of normative heterosexuality, and yet they're in love.” [Jewcy: Daily Shvitz]

Comment Is Free (and Easy): Why aren’t more of you beta testers playing around in our Community Forums? At the very least, leave a note saying when you’re so disinclined to leave a note. If you’re not so keen on any of our topics, here, start your own! [Jewcy: Forums]

The World

As Long As I’m Not In Charge, The World Can Go To Hell: Bill Clinton shows his megalomania can run laps around the combined ego quotient of Fox News: “I mean, because tomorrow when I get up, if there’s a bad headline in the paper, it’s President Bush’s responsibility, not mine. That’s the joy of being a former president.” [Fox News]

99 Problems, and Beirut Ain’t One: 5,000 Unfil troops in Lebanon with a mandate to do… very much of nothing: “So while there may have been some expectation that the international force would disarm or restrain Hezbollah, or search for hidden weapons caches, the commanders on the ground say very clearly that those tasks are not their job for now. “We will advise, help and assist the Lebanese forces,” said Col. Rosario Walter Guerrisi, commander of the San Marco Regiment, referring to the Lebanese Army.” A couple of scarecrows with blue berets would have done the trick cheaper. (I think they’re on sale at Home Depot.) [NYT]

As to that first charge: Mahmoud Ahmadinejad is down on being public Jew-baiter number one but he’s got an interesting way of defending himself. “There were those who had accused me of being a murderer and anti-Semitic, but I’m not an anti-Semite.” I like this sort of verbal jujitsu on 2^nd Avenue: “People say I would like to build a nuclear bomb and wipe Israel off the map, but I do not want a nuclear bomb.” [YNet]

Evolution and Evangelicalism Go Together Like Fire and Brimstone: Michael Shermer explains original sin and human nature: “As a social primate, we evolved within-group amity and between-group enmity. By nature, then, we are cooperative and competitive, altruistic and selfish, greedy and generous, peaceful and bellicose; in short, good and evil. Moral codes and a society based on the rule of law are necessary to accentuate the positive and attenuate the negative sides of our evolved nature.” [Scientific American]

Saddam Kicked Out of Court (Again): Russian oil industrialist Vladimir Khordovsky was given the Kong treatment in court, and this Caligulan monster whines about his “cage”: “Judge Muhammad Oreibi al-Khalifa ordered the former Iraqi leader to leave after refusing his request to be let out of his metal cage.” [BBC]

It’s Bert’s Unibrow That’s Inappropriate: Triumph the Insult Comic Dog physically assaults an Ernie doll on stage. He’s no rubber duckie but he gets the job done. Sesame Street is not amused. “’It's very inappropriate,’ one insider fumed. A spokeswoman for the educational nonprofit said the puppet-sex act was under investigation.” [Page Six]

Peretz: Talks with Hamas Possible: Shana Tovah resolution-making, or war weariness to account for this? “Speaking in a Rosh Hashana interview with Israel Radio Saturday, Peretz said that if Hamas met these conditions, a Palestinian unity government was not needed as a prerequisite to talks.” [J-Post]

Muslims Intellectuals Write to Bush: Calling for redoubled U.S. commitment to advancing democracy and pluralism in the Middle East. “To mention but one case where U.S. influence may do much good, Egypt has lately seen a regime crackdown on opposition activists. In February, the government postponed municipal elections and renewed the emergency law. The regime has not even spared Egypt ' s venerable judiciary which has steadfastly proclaimed its independence in recent months. And liberal opposition politician Ayman Nour, who was allowed to run in last year’s presidential election and won 7.6% of the popular vote, second behind President Mubarak, was arrested and sentenced in a murky process to five years in jail. The health of Mr. Nour, a dear friend and colleague of many of us, continues to deteriorate. We pray that you will take his case to heart and let the Egyptian regime hear your concerns.” [Center for the Study of Islam and Democracy]