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The Porn Industry Asks for a Bailout

First the banks wanted a bailout, then the American automakers jumped on the bandwagon of government funding. I never thought the porn industry would do it as well. Lo and behold Hustler editor Larry Flynt and Joe Francis (the creator of Girls Gone Wild, of which I am a big fan) have penned a letter to congress requesting $5 billion in government money to help bail out the porn industry.

Sales of adult DVDs were down 22% in the past year causing Francis and Flynt to ask Congress to "rejuvenate the sexual appetite of America" with a bailout. Just last week Lilit Marcus wrote on Jewcy about the closing of the strip club Scores, a Manhattan landmark that couldn’t ride out the economic storm.  

Don’t get me wrong, I love porn, but I haven’t paid for it since I switched to high speed internet. I don’t know anyone who pays for porn, with the amount of free porn out there; it’s simply absurd to actually pay for it. So the real question to ask the porn industry is: if their downward turn is due to economic concerns forcing folks to buy diapers instead of the latest copy of Barely Legal, or is it the abundance of free porn available for anyone with a computer and a decent internet connection?

Seems to me that its time for the porn industry to come up with something new, rather then use taxpayer dollars to bailout a dying business plan. For instance, Jewish porn (which, according to my countless hours of Google searches with different Jewish phrases combined with any all sorts of pornographic details have turned up fruitless). I am not alone. There are thousands of Jews like myself that would love to see some Seminary Girls Gone Wild videos. Let us not forget those folks whose only reason to attend Shabbat services is to fantasize about ravaging Rabbi Cohen on the bimah as everyone wonders why they are not reading the Torah. When’s the last time you stumbled across some hot Rabbi porn? Think of the possibilities!

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