Hostess Confidential: The Health Inspector is Back

Previously: The Health Inspector Is Here

The general manager walks slowly towards the health-inspector. “Hi, how can I help you?” he asks as his voice cracks. “Show me your kitchen.” The health inspector replies. She takes out her clipboard and hands him her badge. She has fined, closed, and ruined hundreds of restaurants. It’s her job, and she could stick a knife in the ass of anyone who gets in her way. “Right this way,” the GM says, leading her to the kitchen. Normally, the GM struts through the restaurant. Today, he is having a hard time keeping his balance. As soon as the GM and the health inspector disappear, Amy, the bartender screams at me. “Why didn’t you tell me the health inspector was here?” I’ve made a big mistake. In my effort to save the kitchen, I neglected the bar. I forgot to warn her. Amy is cleaning all of the liquor bottles and throwing out all of the garnishes. She’s got a lot of work to do, so I duck under the bar to help her. I throw out all of the breadsticks and start windexing the bar. Meanwhile, Amy is shoving all of the dirty wine glasses in the dishwasher, checking the expiration date on all of the juice containers, and making sure that none of our mixers smell funky. As I wipe down the bar, I peer over and see the GM and the health inspector making their way up the stairs.