Now Reading
Bring Back These Jewish Wedding Customs
Slut for Slicha
A Very Jewcy Rosh Hashanah
Snipped and Satisfied
Schtupless in Seattle
Gefilte Guilt
Messy Meshugane. Again.

Bring Back These Jewish Wedding Customs

dybbuk

It being the summer, it’s wedding season. I admit, it’s also less than a fortnight to my own wedding, and I’ve tried to avoid doing productive things like find a florist by diving into the coolest wedding traditions I can find, more obscure gems than just breaking a glass. There are lots of amazing ones that you can’t seem to find on the Internet, which seems mostly focused on explaining for the 613th time what a chuppah is. And so, here a few favorites I have gleaned:

Helping your friends find a match

Throwing a bouquet to give luck in finding a match is way too limited. Why leave that up to chance, when your most deserving, most eligible friend has to miss out because they didn’t play sports in High School? Jewish weddings are peppered with chances to distribute matchmaking mazel, and what’s more, the bride has the power to pick the recipients.

For example, in Ashkenazi tradition, women don’t wear jewelry under the chuppah during the ceremony. The sweet explanation is that a couple is marrying for partnership, not material gain, but this may also be because a formal part of the ceremony is the giving of a ring; it may be “legalistically” confusing for the bride to have other jewelry at the time she receives the ring.

But of course you’re going to wear jewelry at your wedding, so what do you do? Right before the ceremony, the bride may remove all of her other jewelry and give it to friends to hold. Those who have the honor of holding this jewelry are said to have extra luck in finding a spouse of their own.

The same applies to Jewish weddings where a plate is broken before the ceremony. If you can get a shard (careful with that!), more good luck.

Another one is that after dinner, the bride and groom share a drink of wine during birkat hamazon (grace after meals). If you can get a sip of that too, you share in their luck (and germs).

Plus, some brides pray the morning of their weddings, and collect names of people who want matches, healing, et cetera. Apparently, her prayers are super potent that day. Get in on that.

Henna Party

In some Sephardic and Mizrahi traditions, before her wedding, a bride is adorned with henna, in a layered and deeply meaningful event. This can include drumming, ululation, and fertility rituals. Also, henna body art is absolutely stunning.

DEMONS DEMONS DEMONS

It is absolutely amazing how much of Jewish wedding traditions involve fear of demons. Of course, the famous play The Dybbuk involves a bride suffering demonic possession, but her position as newlywed was not only chosen to create high drama. Demons in Judaism famously love ruining happy moments (babies pre-bris are also vulnerable), so you have to be ON GUARD for about a week up to the big day, or something terrible and demonic (e.g. possession) will occur.

A lot of the Jewish rituals you do know have alternate explanations based in demonology. Carrying candles (like in Fiddler on the Roof)? Demons hate light. Marrying under a canopy? Protect the couple from demons. Breaking a glass? Demons hate that sort of thing, apparently. Circling your spouse-to-be at the start of the ceremony? Creating an anti-demonic force-field. The above-mentioned henna party? It also protects against demons!

But maybe my absolute favorite has been the role of bridesmaids in the wedding. I’ve heard a lot of variations on this custom, but the gist is that you can’t leave a bride alone, and therefore vulnerable to dybbuks or other nasties. Some say that for a week before the wedding, the bride needs constant surveillance, perhaps by a friend or family member serving as a bridesmaid. At the very least, the night before her wedding, a bride should not sleep alone (one friend had to share her sister’s bed to protect her for this very reason).

Imagine the movie Bridesmaids crossed with Ghostbusters— Kristen Wiig is in both after all, and has a Jewish boyfriend. She should definitely star in a movie about a friend asked to serve as maid of honor for her Jewish friend’s wedding, only to find out that fighting demons comes with the job description.

Hollywood, call me.

 

If you have other great Jewish wedding traditions, please comment below, or tweet us @Jewcymag!

Images: Still from film The Dybbuk. Henna image via Pixabay.

View Comments (43)
  • Thank you for sharing excellent informations. Your web site is so cool. I am impressed by the details that you’ve on this website. It reveals how nicely you understand this subject. Bookmarked this web page, will come back for more articles. You, my pal, ROCK! I found just the info I already searched all over the place and simply couldn’t come across. What a perfect web-site.

  • A formidable share, I just given this onto a colleague who was doing slightly analysis on this. And he in actual fact purchased me breakfast as a result of I found it for him.. smile. So let me reword that: Thnx for the treat! However yeah Thnkx for spending the time to debate this, I feel strongly about it and love studying more on this topic. If potential, as you change into expertise, would you thoughts updating your blog with more details? It’s highly helpful for me. Big thumb up for this weblog post!

  • Fantastic beat ! I wish to apprentice even as you amend your site, how could i subscribe for
    a blog web site? The account helped me a applicable deal.
    I were a little bit acquainted of this your broadcast offered
    bright transparent concept

  • Pretty nice post. I just stumbled upon your blog and
    wanted to say that I’ve really enjoyed surfing around your blog posts.
    After all I’ll be subscribing to your rss feed and I hope you write again soon!

  • Hi there, i read your blog occasionally and i own a similar one and i was just curious if you get a lot
    of spam remarks? If so how do you protect against it, any plugin or anything you can suggest?

    I get so much lately it’s driving me crazy so any help is very much appreciated.

    Feel free to surf to my blog :: tracfone

  • Greetings! I know this is kind of off topic but I was wondering if
    you knew where I could locate a captcha plugin for my comment form?
    I’m using the same blog platform as yours and I’m having trouble finding one?
    Thanks a lot!

    my web blog; tracfone

  • Excellent web site you have here.. It’s hard to find good
    quality writing like yours nowadays. I truly appreciate individuals like you!

    Take care!!

  • What’s up to every body, it’s my first go to see of this weblog; this website carries awesome and really excellent information for visitors.

  • It’s a shame you don’t have a donate button! I’d without a doubt donate to this brilliant blog!
    I suppose for now i’ll settle for book-marking and adding your RSS feed
    to my Google account. I look forward to new updates and will talk about this blog with my Facebook group.
    Chat soon!

  • Hi just wanted to give you a brief heads up and let
    you know a few of the pictures aren’t loading correctly.

    I’m not sure why but I think its a linking issue. I’ve tried it in two different browsers and both show the same results.

  • When I originally left a comment I seem to have clicked on the -Notify me when new comments are added-
    checkbox and now every time a comment is added I recieve 4 emails with
    the same comment. Is there an easy method you are able to
    remove me from that service? Many thanks!

  • Thanks a bunch for sharing this with all of us
    you really realize what you are talking approximately!
    Bookmarked. Please also consult with my website =). We could have a hyperlink exchange contract between us

  • Hello to all, how is everything, I think every one is getting more from this web site,
    and your views are good in support of new viewers.

  • Oh my goodness! Awesome article dude! Thank you, However I am going through troubles with your RSS.
    I don’t understand the reason why I cannot join it.

    Is there anybody else getting identical RSS problems?
    Anyone who knows the answer will you kindly respond?
    Thanks!!

  • Have you ever considered creating an e-book or guest authoring on other sites?
    I have a blog based upon on the same ideas you discuss and would really
    like to have you share some stories/information. I know
    my readers would enjoy your work. If you are even remotely interested, feel
    free to shoot me an e-mail.

  • of course like your web-site but you need to check the spelling on quite a few of
    your posts. A number of them are rife with spelling issues and I find it very troublesome to
    inform the truth on the other hand I will definitely
    come back again.

  • Simply desire to say your article is as astonishing. The
    clearness for your put up is simply nice and that i could suppose you’re a
    professional in this subject. Well along with your permission let me to take hold of your feed to keep updated with forthcoming
    post. Thank you 1,000,000 and please keep up the gratifying work.

  • This is very interesting, You’re a very skilled blogger.
    I have joined your feed and look forward to seeking more of your wonderful
    post. Also, I’ve shared your site in my social networks!

  • Howdy! This post couldn’t be written any better!
    Going through this post reminds me of my previous
    roommate! He always kept talking about this. I most certainly will forward this article
    to him. Pretty sure he will have a very good read.

    Thanks for sharing!

  • We are a gaggle of volunteers and starting a brand new scheme in our community.

    Your web site offered us with useful info to work on. You have performed a formidable
    activity and our entire neighborhood will be thankful to you.

  • I seriously love your blog.. Pleasant colors & theme.
    Did you develop this web site yourself? Please reply back as I’m looking to create my very own site and want to learn where you got this
    from or exactly what the theme is named. Many thanks!

  • I do not know if it’s just me or if perhaps everyone else experiencing issues with your website.
    It appears as if some of the written text in your content are running off the screen.
    Can somebody else please provide feedback and let me know if this is happening to them too?
    This might be a problem with my internet browser because I’ve had this happen before.

    Kudos

  • Ahaa, its good discussion concerning this post at this place at this webpage,
    I have read all that, so at this time me also commenting here.

  • Hi, I found your article by mistake when i was searching bing for this issue, I have to say your article is really helpful I also love the theme, its amazing!. I dont have that much time to read all your post at the moment but I have bookmarked it and also add your RSS feeds. I will be back in a day or two. thank you for a huge site.

  • Hey! Would you mind if I share your blog with my zynga group?
    There’s a lot of people that I think would really enjoy your content.
    Please let me know. Thanks

  • Hey! I’m at work browsing your blog from my new apple iphone!

    Just wanted to say I love reading your blog
    and look forward to all your posts! Carry on the excellent work!

  • Great beat ! I would like to apprentice while you amend your website, how can i subscribe for a blog site?
    The account helped me a acceptable deal. I had been a little bit acquainted of this your broadcast provided bright clear
    idea

  • Great beat ! I wish to apprentice at the same time as you amend
    your web site, how can i subscribe for a weblog web site? The account helped me a acceptable deal.
    I had been tiny bit acquainted of this your broadcast provided bright clear
    idea

  • Everyone loves what you guys tend to be up too.
    Such clever work and exposure! Keep up the awesome works guys I’ve
    incorporated you guys to my personal blogroll.

  • You should take part in a contest for one of the highest quality
    blogs on the net. I most certainly will highly recommend this website!

  • Fantastic beat ! I wish to apprentice whilst you amend
    your website, how can i subscribe for a weblog site?
    The account helped me a appropriate deal. I have been a little bit familiar of this your
    broadcast provided vivid clear concept

  • Was koche ich heute – diese Frage stellen sich tag fuer tag viele Menschen. Und wir haben tag fuer tag die perfeckte Antwort darauf! Besuchen Sie uns auf unserer Webseite und lassen Sie sich von uns beraten . Wir freuen uns auf Sie!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

Scroll To Top